Seth slips inside, then closes the door behind him.
We are alone. Our breathing keeps us company, the chatter from the kitchen in the background. His eyes search mine for confirmation that he has done nothing wrong. Mine look to him for confirmation that what I am feeling right now is not wrong.
“It was a surprise.”
“Well, that was the idea. I hope it wasn’t unwelcome.”
“No, not at all. Please don’t think you’ve done anything wrong, because you haven’t.”
“I wouldn’t want to exaggerate, because you know I tend to do that.”
I laugh and shake my head.
“Would you like to come outside with me? The others are setting the table, the stew is ready and there’s cake. The kids made it for you and…”
I take his hand and pull him closer, my fingers gently caressing his face as I press my lips against his. Before he can remember who I am or what I’m doing in this house with him, I kiss him. Just enough time to feel the softness of his mouth on mine, to taste his breath, and to wish this moment would last forever before I finally let him go.
“Oh…” Seth says, brushing his lips with his fingers. A light blush appears on his cheeks. “This… Um…”
“I’m sorry. I don’t know what came over me.”
Now it is his lips that press against mine, just long enough for him to forget who he is and what he is doing here, with me; to feel the desire on my lips and hold my breath before leaving me alone again.
His face is bright red and hot; I can feel it under my own fingers. We look at each other for a few moments, our eyes locked, our breathing quickening. Then someone knocks at the door, calling us back, breaking the spell of that shared moment, leaving us feeling lost together for just a while, somewhere in the world.
“We’re coming!” Seth says to Mason, his face turned towards the door.
He waits a few more seconds, then looks at me again. “I’m sorry.”
I shake my head with vigour. “I was the one who started it.”
“True, but… don’t apologise, will you?”
“Only if you don’t either.”
“Will you get out of there?” This time it is Emily’s voice that calls us back.
“We’d better…” Seth points to the door behind him.
I nod and reluctantly feel him slip out of my arms, aware that I still want him, and want him so badly, and that I have just complicated everything and with one damn kiss.
* * *
“THIS IS GOOD, Seth,” Vanessa says.
“Thank you, you are kind to say so,” Seth replies.
“That’s right, Uncle Seth. It’s really good,” Logan remarks.
I can’t speak, I can’t even swallow, and not because this stew isn’t good, but because with every spoonful a flood of memories invades me, threatening to jeopardise this moment, the days with them, and my whole life.
I would like not to remember. I wish I could just live this moment and experience it with the serenity it deserves. I wish I could wipe out the past in a breath. To forget who I was, the suffering, the loneliness. To forget that I was vulnerable. To forget I had a broken heart.
Seth smiles happily. “As you all know, or almost all of you,” he looks at Vanessa and Paul, sitting next to each other, “I’m not good at cooking.”
The kids giggle.
“In fact, I didn’t even try to make the cake. I wanted to get it at the bakery nearby, but the kids insisted, and so…”
