“I didn’t invite him. I can be quite shy,” he answers for me. “I didn’t want to keep it a secret, but… I like keeping some things to myself. I’m not sure if that makes sense.”
“It absolutely does, dear.”
“I have to admit, this house is… Intimidating,” he says then, changing the subject and leaving me surprised.
“What an interesting choice of word.”
“I’m sorry. It’s just that… It makes me feel…”
“Nervous,” I say, suddenly. “Pressured.”
Sean and my grandmother look at me, waiting for me to elaborate. The truth is that I have no intention of doing so – I didn’t even mean to say what I just said. It was instinctive.
“I understand.” My grandmother’s voice is sweet. “It’s certainly not a great house for small children.” She looks at Sean. “Frederick spent a lot of time here with me.”
“Really?” he asks, politely interested.
“He liked walking the trails through the hills, or going down to the beach and collecting seashells.”
Sean looks at me, and I feel embarrassed, exposed beneath his eyes. My throat constricts, and I take another sip of my drink.
“I was always alone, and he…”
“Me, too.” The drink didn’t help. My throat is still bone dry. “They didn’t want me getting under their feet, so they shipped me off here.”
Sean doesn’t know how to take my confession. His eyes shift from me to my grandmother in search of a way to move on.
“It was best for everyone,” I say then, not sure that I want to have this conversation, but sure that I don’t want to hurt my grandmother. “I was happy here.” I take Granny’s hand and smile at her. “I couldn’t have asked for better.”
And it’s true. This was the only place I felt loved.
She smiles back at me, squeezing my hand.
“This was home.”
“It still is.”
“Dinner is ready, Mrs. Carson,” Larry interjects.
My grandmother gets to her feet and we mirror her movements. “Will we head in?” She waves for us to follow her to the other side of the room. “I’ve made fillet steak. I hope you like it, Sean.”
“You cooked?” I ask, shocked.
“Of course I cooked.”
“You haven’t cooked for a while.”
“Not since the last time you came for dinner. When Frederick is here, I always take care of dinner,” she explains to Sean as we take our seats at the table. “I like cooking for the people I love.”
I smile under her loving gaze.
“Besides, I don’t have much else to do in this immense house, except writing checks and answering long phone calls.”
“Don’t you run the foundation?” Sean asks kindly.
“Not anymore, dear. I’m retired, apparently.”
“Apparently?”
