Everything swirling in his eyes was exactly why it’d been hard to look at him. I felt like I was going to crack open and spill all the thoughts running through my mind. But one look and I realized—he already knew.
“You’re in charge,” he said. “Touch me. Fuck me like I’m not a monster.”
I shook my head and ran my fingers down his face, over his scar. “You were never the monster. Just a man in a cage of your own making.Mon monstre.”
He nodded as his lips met mine. “Yours.”
My heart squeezed. For the first time in my life, I wished that could be true. I’d never wanted anyone I could keep before. And of all the people I’d met over my forty-two years on Earth, it had to be Dimitri Stavros. Our paths couldn’t be more different. I’d been sent to betray him, spy, find out who he really was and then get the hell outta Dodge.
And yet…
Here we were. And I wouldn’t regret even a second of the time we’d spent together.
I fell deeper into his kiss and began to slowly rock on top of him again. As I clenched my ass around him, Dimitri broughtme in closer, wrapping me in his arms and keeping every inch of us connected. He surrounded and filled me so completely that I didn’t think anything could tear us apart.
His moan when I sucked on his tongue and began to move my hips faster spurred me on. I wanted to give him back all the pleasure he’d taken from me the past weeks. Keeping our mouths connected, I lifted up from his lap before slamming back down on his cock. The sounds ripping out of Dimitri with every thrust as he chased my hole were feral, untamed.
I jolted as he reached between us to take hold of my cock and give it a firm stroke.
“Oui,” I breathed, arching my head back as he worked his fist up and down my length and then dropped his mouth onto my neck. The way he sucked at me would bruise, but I welcomed it, wondering if he just wanted to mark me in a way that would last beyond tonight.
When sweat dripped down my temple as we raced to see who could get the other off first, Dimitri licked the path it left on my skin, and I almost lost it.
My legs began to shake every time I lowered onto him, and then my pace started to become uneven. I needed to come, but I didn’t want this to be over yet.
Our bodies had other ideas.
As Dimitri jerked me off, his hand stuttered, and then every muscle in his powerful body tightened.
“Fuck, Benoit—” His words cut off as a hot rush filled my ass and he gasped. I didn’t even need his fingers to make me come. Just watching the ecstasy on his face as he locked eyes with mine had my dick exploding between us.
With my hips rocking us through the never-ending waves of our climaxes, I held on tight to him, breathing in his scent where it was strongest beneath his ear.
This was perfect. Heaven. Why I hadn’t realized it before now was one of the great mistakes of my life.
I wish I could?—
“Wish you could what?” Dimitri’s question had me realizing I’d started to say those private thoughts out loud, and I snapped my mouth shut.
He leaned back, taking my chin in hand and searching my eyes. It didn’t matter what I said; it had to be written all over my expression.
There went having the best poker face among my brothers.
“Tell me,” he demanded, and I couldn’t find it in myself to lie to him anymore.
I brushed his hair back from his face. “I wish I could stay. I wish I could love you.”
What I didn’t say wasfor the rest of our lives, but that had been enough.
Those dark, piercing eyes softened and he swallowed. “I know,” he said quietly, bringing my hand to his lips and pressing a kiss to each one of my fingers. “I wish that too.”
And that was almost worse than silence.
36
DIMITRI
HE WAS GONE.
