“Because! He’s always gazing at you as if he wants to swallow you whole.”
“How romantic.” I giggle. “Like a whale. Zach the whale.”
“Want me to say he looks at you as if you hung the moon and stars? Because he does that, too.”
I gulp. “Sawyer?—”
“He gazes at you as if he can’t live without you.”
For some reason, a sob catches in my throat. “Don’t.”
Instantly he sounds alert. “What is it? Did something happen? Is someone trying to break in?”
“No. No, nothing like that,” I reassure him. “Everything’s fine.”
“Do you need me to come over? Even if it’s only to give you a hug.”
“Aww.” He’s so sweet! “No, I’m good. But thank you. I mean it.”
“Anytime.”
“I’ll let you be with your pack,” I whisper. “Good night.”
“Night, night! And send me pics of Ryder! I wanna see that sexy boy.”
“Sawyer! Ask your boyfriend for pics. He works with the guy. I’m not taking any photos.”
He laughs as he hangs up, the voices of his pack mingling with his.
I put my phone down and close my eyes, curling up on the sofa, loving that he has found his family, and hoping one day I’ll find mine.
22
COCO
I dream I’m moving through a nightclub with strobing lights, looking for someone. It’s that angsty, heart-pounding feeling you get in dreams, the sense that you’ll be too late, that something is chasing you in the shadows. An undefined monster. A danger lurking in wait.
I shove harder at the dancing people around me to open a path, but the more I push, the tighter the crowd becomes. Suffocating. Crushing.
No, no! I need to find… find my family, my men. I can’t get caught. I have to warn them. It’s dangerous. I shouldn’t be here. We shouldn’t be here.
We should be together, we should?—
Hands grab me, lifting me. One covers my mouth and I can’t breathe. I try to yell but I have no breath left in my lungs. I thrash and writhe, trying to dislodge their grip on me, kicking out and wheezing?—
Then I fall and hit the ground hard.
Ow.
Blinking my crusty lashes open, I find myself in my apartment. In my living room. On the floor between my sofa and the low coffee table.
What the hell? I fell off the sofa. Did I…? Yeah, I must have fallen asleep there.
Great. Excellent adulting, Coco. You deserve a badge.
My muscles are cramped and I groan as I sit up. My entire right side feels like a giant bruise. My carpet is thick—with hearts printed on it, thank you—so it can’t be my fall from my very low sofa. I probably spent the night sleeping on my side.
Old age is getting to me. I can’t imagine what will happen by the time I’m forty. Maybe I should eat better and do more exercise.
