“Every evening.”
Not the truth, but also not a lie. After all, I don’t know if Zach is coming over ever again.
“I’ll walk you home,” he says.
I fight the relief I feel. “You don’t have to.”
“Your safety is my priority,” he says and my heart falls again.
Why can’t it be enough? I ask myself. He’s obviously protective by nature. By instinct. It’s an alpha thing, and for some reason, he chose to protect me even though he wants nothing more from me.
Take it, say thank you, and stop hoping for more.
Yet as we exit the building, I have to wonder… Was it a bad idea to take the job? Does it mean I can’t get involved with my employer? My boss?
Because damn, I want to…
“Thank you,” I say brightly when we reach my building. It was a kind of uncomfortable walk. An uncomfortable silence. “Here we are!”
He stuffs his hands into his pants pockets. In the radiance from the street lamps, he looks unbearably handsome. “I’ll wait here until you turn on your lights.”
“Or you could come up,” I chirp. “Have a nightcap with me.”
His mouth tightens. “I should get back home.”
I pout. “Just for a little while?”
“I really can’t.”
I nod. Stop pushing, I tell myself. Whatever you imagined was there simply… isn’t. He’s not interested, girl! Open your eyes.
I turn to enter but find my steps faltering. I twist back around. “Did I do something wrong? If you changed your mind about the job, it’s fi?—”
“I haven’t changed my mind about anything.”
Okay. Cryptic but… okay. At least I still have a job, no matter how weird that is turning out to be.
“See you tomorrow evening then.” I give a little wave and this time, I turn resolutely my back to him and hoof it inside and up the stairs. I may be feeling a little morose, but what did I expect? He’s a mogul. Why would he take any special interest in a girl like me?
I’m just a charity case, I’ll bet. His charity project. He’s just invested because of what happened at his bar. And I can’t afford to refuse the help.
But that’s all it is. I should focus my own interest on people who like me back, and not in a brotherly way.
Like Zach? Who ran away the moment you kissed? Or Ryder?
Sighing, I enter my apartment, turn on the lights and lock the door. I don’t open my window to see if Atticus is still below, on the street. What’s the point? Seeing the light, he has to have left.
I’m safe, and that’s all that matters to him.
I strip out of my overalls and then my bra—finally, my God!—and throw both in the direction of the bathroom. Then I raid my kitchen for a late-night dinner and find some mac-and-cheese June made for me a couple of days back. I eat it cold from the fridge.
Then I grab some ice cream and drop onto my sofa, turning on the TV. I hug a fluffy pillow to my chest, curl my legs under me and stare at the program without really seeing it.
I want so much a night out with the girls, my girls, but I can’t. I don’t feel ready, even if I know that the odds of another kidnapping attempt are slim. Anxiety doesn’t follow logic. Just the thought of going out has me in a cold sweat.
I also don’t want to bother June who is still conspicuously absent from my life, even as I eat her food.
But Sawyer… Sawyer said I could call him at any time.
