?
I was walking up to my trailer when I passed William, who was on his way to the barn.
“Emma, do you have a second?” he asked.
“Hi, William, what’s going on?”
“What is Riley doing? He is up before the sun rises and comes back looking like he actually worked a day in his Godforsaken life.”
“That’s exactly what he is doing. Whatever happened between you two, it lit a fuse. He is determined to prove to you that he has what it takes.”
“So he has you showing him what to do?” he asked.
“Yes, unfortunately for me, and fortunately for you and him.”
He nodded his head.
“What about that mouth of his?” he pressed.
“William, I’m not going to be a spy. Whatever is going on is between you and your son. All I can tell you is he is trying. Each day is a new day with new struggles, but he is a man who is trying. I wouldn’t push any further,” I told him.
He gave me a look, trying to make my words into something more. I was defending Riley, which to William probably seemed off. Hell, it was odd to me.
“Have a good evening, Emma,” he said, dismissing me.
“Good night, William.
It was the first time I had ever talked to him with any authority in my voice. Why now?
Ten
Riley
Father was standing on the front lawn speaking with Emma, and something about it made me angry. Her body language seemed tense, and his body language was similar.
The old man had his dogs and spies watching me all of the time, never trusting me to be alone. Here he was, talking with Emma. Was she in his court of spies? With the length of their conversation, it seemed like she was. This was more than a friendlyhi, how are you?
She stalked away to her trailer, and Father stopped to watch me watching him. Then he turned around and walked away. He still looked disappointed, like what I had done would never be enough. Whatever Emma said to him, he wasn’t happy about. Was I not progressing fast enough? Was I being a dick? I thought I had remedied that, but apparently not.
Why would Emma sabotage this? Whatever this was between us, she said she didn’t want it. She didn’t really want to even be friends; that much was clear. But to play spy to my father, that felt like a complete violation of my privacy.
Screw him. He might have raised me, but it was clear as day that he didn’t want to be my father. He didn’t want me to continue the family legacy. He’s looking for any reason to give this farm to someone else, like Emma. For him to make more threats against the last thing I held dear felt like a direct attack. I turned and walked toward the back door of the house so I wouldn’t have to interact with him. If he wasn’t with me, then he was against me. I went into my room and showered and changed.
Maybe it’s a good thing that Emma turned me down. Since she was in Father’s pocket, all she would do was tattle on me to him. I shouldn’t have been surprised. Father did say she would be better suited for the farm; maybe she had her sights set on taking my inheritance, my home.
I let the fifteen years of anger and resentment settle back into my bones. It was easier to blame Emma and hate her than it was to appease my father. It was easier to stick to the status quo. Father talked down to me, and then I took it out on Emma. Why should anything change that now?
Fuck this place. Fuck my mother, who walked out on me. Fuck my father, who never made an ounce of time for me. Never bothered to show me what I should know about horses, about being a man. Fuck Emma for making me want to try to be a better man and stabbing me in the back while she did it.
It was too easy to fall back into the hatred and the lies I had been coaching myself through for years. I had done it to help Emma and to help myself. Now I just did it to build the barrier back around my heart.
I grabbed my keys to my truck; it had been fixed yesterday. I dashed out of the house and climbed into it. I raced down the driveway without glancing back at the trailer or the girl living in her dead parents’ shadow.
?
I drank in the feeling of standing in the crowd, a drink in each hand. Girls were dancing all around me, up against me, and I was loving it. I couldn’t believe I almost gave this up.
For a fleeting moment, I thought of Emma. How would she dance if she was here? I bet she’d swing those hips suggestively and would smile at me, like she did when we were leading in the horses the first day.
