I lookedacross the sleeping boy sprawled between me and Tuck, a soft smile curving my mouth. Noah had made it to 10:35 this year. My boy was growing up. It wouldn’t be long before he was up well past midnight.
As the credits toTheKarate Kid Part IIrolled, I started to rise.
Tuck stood quicker. “I’ve got him.”
My movements stuttered. “Okay.”
Tuck lifted Noah as though he weighed nothing more than the bowl of potato chips on the coffee table. I followed them up the stairs. Tuck made his way into Noah’s room, and I snuck in front of them to pull back the covers so Tuck could lay him gently on the bed. Knowing how the night would likely go, I’d made Noah get in his pajamas before we started the second movie.
I pulled up the covers and snuggled Noah’s favorite bear next to him. I pressed my lips to my son’s hair, inhaling deeply the scent that was uniquely Noah’s. “Love you,” I whispered.
As I rose, Tuck grabbed my hand, leading me into the hall. “You’re an amazing mom.”
I shook my head. “You’ve seen us when we’re a basket-case mess. I could do better.”
Tuck framed my face with his hands. “It’s not about things looking perfect all the time. It’s about loving him and doing everything you can to give him the best life possible. You do that every single day.”
Three little words hovered on the tip of my tongue, urging me to say them, but something held me back. I brushed my lips against his, soaking up the heat and the feel of him. I could get lost in his kisses forever. I pulled back just slightly.
I couldn’t say those three little words, but I could be brave enough to saysomething. “This is more.” My gaze tangled with his, so many unsaid things dancing between us. “You’ve always been more. It’s just taken me a third of my life to see it.”
A brief flare of panic shone in Tuck’s eyes, mixed with something that looked a lot like pain, but he seemed to rein it in. “I don’t know if I can be what you need me to be.”
I gripped his wrists on either side of my face. “You already are. All I’m asking is that we take this one day at a time and see where it leads.”
“One day at a time.” Tuck pressed his mouth against mine. “I can do one day at a time.”
36
Tuck
I tooka sip of coffee as I pored over paperwork at my kitchen table. The stuff never seemed to end, and always found a way home with me. It didn’t help that my head just wasn’t in the game these days. My mind wandered often, and always to the same place. Jensen.
My Wilder was going to drive me to distraction. And I would die of death by paperwork. The conversation on New Year’s Eve had freaked me out. No, honestly, it’d terrified me, but I was determined to push through. We’d crossed a line that couldn’t be uncrossed, and I wanted to make this work. I’d give anything to make it work.
My phone buzzed somewhere on the table. I patted the different stacks of paper, trying to find it. It buzzed again. My hand connected with something. I lifted a pile and hit accept without taking note of who was calling. “Hello?”
“Tuck.”
I set down the stack of papers. “Hey, Cain. Happy New Year.”
“Happy New Year. You get up to any trouble on New Year’s Eve?”
I grinned down at my coffee as I thought of my evening. “I hung out with Jensen and Noah.”
There was a moment of silence. “Walker know about that?”
My morning coffee soured in my gut. One thing I hadn’t put a lot of thought into was how Walker would react to my seeing his sister. I hadn’t put much thought into it because I’d planned for this to be temporary. But now that we were trying for more, I would have to tell him, and it wasn’t going to be pretty. I cleared my throat. “I’m not sure.”
Cain grunted.
I gripped the handle of my mug a little tighter. “What? Do you have a date with him after this for a gossip session?”
“No, but I was going to call him now that he knows I’ve been looking into Jensen’s situation.”
I straightened. “Did you find something?”
“I found the motherload.”
