“Oh, baby.” She wrapped her arms around me. “They’re doing everything they can.”
“We have to go, now.” It was the male EMT who said it.
My father stepped forward. “We’re going to follow.”
I moved closer to them all, my gaze not leaving Tuck’s face that had far too little color. “Is he going to be okay?”
The EMT grimaced. “It depends on how quickly we can get to the hospital.”
52
Jensen
Beep.Beep. Beep.I tried to take comfort in the sound. It meant that Tuck’s heart was still beating. He was breathing. But I kept trying to interpret eachbeep. Was that one shorter? What did that mean? It was an endless cycle.
I traced circles on the back of Tuck’s hand with my fingertip. His heart had stopped three times in the past forty-eight hours. But it had started beating again four times. Four was my new favorite number. I drew it on the back of Tuck’s hand. “You’re too damn stubborn to give up. I know you. I know you better than anyone, and you won’t let a bullet take you out.”
I lifted his hand and placed it against my cheek. The hand that told the story of his life. I wanted it to have more stories to tell. I wanted the skin to sag and be peppered with age spots. I wanted one of those fingers to house a band of metal. But most of all, I wanted it to twine with mine for the rest of my days.
Maybe I was crazy. The man hadn’t even told me that he loved me. But I felt it to the depth of my soul. Tears began to splash, soaked up by the hospital blanket.
“You really love him, don’t you?”
I started at the sound of Walker’s voice. I laid Tuck’s hand back on the bed but kept my fingers woven with his. I wasn’t letting go. “I don’t have the energy for this, Walker.”
“I didn’t mean it like that.” When he stepped closer, I saw that his face was ravaged. Guilt had done a number on him. But Walker’s last words to Tuck had been ones of anger, of scorn, and now, his best friend lay in a hospital bed fighting for his life.
Tuck was breathing on his own, but he hadn’t woken up yet after the surgery. The longer he stayed under, the smaller his chances for a complete recovery got. My heart gave a painful squeeze. “So, how did you mean it?” I wasn’t quite ready to let my big brother off the hook. Maybe if he’d have been there instead of leaving in a grown-up hissy fit, things would’ve gone differently.
Walker took a few tentative steps closer, gripping the rail at the end of the bed. “I just didn’t see it.” He shook his head, a hint of a wistful smile playing on his lips. “Taylor says I’m deaf, dumb, and blind when it comes to you two. Maybe she’s right. I’ve played it back a million times in my head. From when we were kids to now—”
“It wasn’t always…this.” I didn’t have a word to encompass what Tuck and I were now.
Walker stared down at Tuck’s frame. “I know that. But you two have always had a special bond. I just didn’t realize how deep it ran.”
More tears spilled over, tracking down my cheeks. I made no move to wipe them away. They were a measure of my love for the man who lay in this bed. “He’s always seen me on a level that others didn’t.”
Walker’s Adam’s apple bobbed as he swallowed. “You do the same for him.”
“I hope so.” I stared at Tuck’s face, tracing the lines of it with my gaze. “I don’t know for sure.”
“I do.” Walker sighed. “The thing I should have known from the second I saw you two together is that he never would’ve gone there if you weren’t everything to him.”
The tears came faster now, curving over my cheeks and dripping off my chin.
Walker shuffled his feet and glanced down. “I’m sorry I was such a grade-A asshole. I’ll never forgive myself for what I said.”
There was an impliedif he doesn’t wake upat the end of that statement. I squeezed my eyes closed. “I’m scared.”
Walker opened his mouth to say something, but my gasp cut him off. Tuck’s hand had tightened around mine the barest amount. A second time. A third.
“He’s squeezing my hand. Go get a doctor.”
Walker jogged out of the room and down the hall.
I leaned over the bed. “Tucker. Open your eyes. Please.”
His eyes moved as if trying to open but weren’t quite able to see the action through. Tuck’s hand squeezed mine again, a little harder this time. One. Two. Three.
