“So, you have feelings for him?”
“What?” I shake my head. “Uh, that’s not wha?—”
“I think that’sexactlywhat you’re sayin’,” he says, cutting me off. “First, you said it wasjust funin the beginning, and now you said you’re into him. Hollis, you have feelings for him.”
That hits me square in the chest, and it steals the breath straight out of my lungs. Sure, I’ve acknowledged how I feelsomethingfor Ford—that much is obvious—but tohave feelingsfor him… That’s a whole different thing.
Right?
Or no?
That can’t be what this is. I would know.
Yeah, what Ford and I have going on is more than just a physical connection, it’s more than just sex, and yeah, being around him feels good, and I look forward to the times I get to see him…which, admittedly, is a whole lot lately. And okay, I admit, the nights I do spend alone now are never as good as the ones spent with him, but that doesn’t mean I have feelings for him.
I don’t do feelings.
Scoffing, I shake my head. “No, that’s… No, you’re wrong, Remi.” A dry laugh bubbles from me as I digest what he’s saying. Every encounter with Ford since we matched flashes through my mind like a slideshow. Every message sent. Every single time we flirted with each other. Every picture sent. How it felt seeing that tattoo and knowing he was the guy on the app. That first time up against the tree… Then again, the next night in his tent. Each time we’ve hung out after that, and the way he’s made me feel. The gentle kisses, the cuddling, the deep, desperate need to see him any chance I can.
Oh, god.
“Shit…” My gaze slides over to Remi, who’s already watching me with…amusement in his eyes? “I think you might be… I think I might… Holy fuck, Remington!” Jumping to my feet, I thrust my fingers into my hair. “Remi, how did this happen?”
Throwing his head back, Remi laughs—fuckinglaughs—to the point of tears in his eyes. “Oh shit, that’s good,” he breathes out.
“How is this funny?”
“You arespiralingover havin’ feelings for somebody,” he explains. “Hollis, you’re nearly fuckin’ thirty. It was bound to happen at some point.”
“But that’s… That’s not what this was supposed to be.” I’m pacing now. “This was supposed to be fun. That’s it.”
“How does Ford feel?”
My brows pinch together as I stop pacing and narrow my gaze. “How am I supposed to know?”
“Uh, haven’t y’all talked about this?”
I nearly balk. “No? What is there to talk about?”
“I don’t know, Hollis.” He snorts. “Maybe that you have feelings for him? Don’t you wanna know if he feels the same?”
I shake my head quickly. “He doesn’t.”
“And you know that how?”
“Because that’s not what this is,” I repeat through gritted teeth. “Wait— Are you not mad?”
“I’m not exactlythrilled, but I’m not mad either.” Then he adds, “I mean, I guess I was a little annoyed at first. Mostly because you were keepin’ it from me, and because I don’t want your dick to get in the way of my career.”
“Ford would never allow that to happen,” I say, tone very matter of fact.
Heaving a sigh, Remi stands up too. “I know that.”
“Remi, I swear, this was never supposed to get this far.”
He places a steady hand on my shoulder, looking me in the eye. “Okay, but now that it has, you have to talk to him. With the divorce behind him, you need to tell him how you feel, see how he feels.”
My face scrunches up. “I don’t get why you’re being so nonchalant about this.”
