College, Senior Year
Nathaniel: Sorry, babe. Won’t be able to make dinner tonight. Someone called out at work, so I gotta cover the shift. Won’t get off till 2. Will make it up to you. Xoxo.
Staring down at the phone in my hand, I try to block the lump of disappointment making itself known in my chest. It’s not his fault he has to work, but fuck, I was really looking forward to our date.
It’s our six-month anniversary, which I know seems like a silly thing to want to celebrate, but for me, it’s a big deal. Nathaniel is my first actual relationship, so six months feels like a significant milestone. I really wanted to treat him to a nice dinner, then take him back to his place—because he lives off campus, while I live in the dorms—andshowhim just how happy he makes me.
I need to quit sulking. There are other nights we can do this. Like tomorrow or next weekend. It doesn’t have to be today, I guess.
The door to my dorm shoves open, peeling my focus from my phone to my roommate, Xander, who’s waltzing in. A boyish grin tugs on his lips, his already bloodshot eyes squinting as he sees me. “What’s up, man?” He must notice my dreary mood because the smile slips. “What’s wrong?”
“Nathaniel and I had plans to go to dinner tonight, but he has to work. I was looking forward to doing something tonight.”
“Where does he work?”
“He’s a server at the burger place a few blocks from campus.”
Nathaniel is here on a partial scholarship, but his family doesn’t come from a lot of money, so he works a few days a week to have extra cash.
“Well, shit, I’m sorry, Trav. But hey, I’m heading to that party the sorority is throwing tonight. Want to come? It’s Friday, so may as well still make the most out of your night, even if it’s not with him.”
“I don’t know,” I mumble. “I’m not in the greatest mood. I probably won’t be any fun.”
“Oh, shut the fuck up,” he drawls. “Let’s smoke a bowl and head over. The weed will help get you out of your head. It’ll be fun.”
Glancing down at my phone and seeing no new texts from Nathaniel, I heave a sigh and agree. Xander rolls us a blunt that we smoke on the walk over to the sorority, and by the time we make it there, my mood is already improving. The house is overflowing with people, a damn near unlimited supply of liquor fills the kitchen counters, kegs line the backyard, and music blares and vibrates the walls.
We both grab a drink before heading out back. A few of our friends are out there playing a heated game of beer pong.
Party Upby DMX sounds through the Bluetooth speaker they have on top of one of the kegs, a group of girls dancing to it on the grass, oblivious to everything around them. They’re probably in the sorority, if I had to guess. Xander jumps in and plays the winners next. His partner is a guy in one of our classes who he’s been trying to hook up with now for a few weeks.
I watch them while occasionally checking my phone. Nathaniel hasn't texted me, but then again, maybe it’s busy at the restaurant. Deciding to be a nice boyfriend, I send him one.
Me: Hope your shift is going okay and you’re making lots of tips. Miss you.
It’s right there on the tip of my thumb to tell him I came to this party with Xander, but I don’t. He can sometimes get jealous or upset if I spend too much time with Xander or if I go to parties without him. He knows I’ve hooked up with a handful of the people who frequently come to these types of things, and that makes him feel some type of way.
Nathaniel also thinks these parties are lame and a waste of time. He’d much rather stay in together or go out to dinner, just the two of us. Since we started dating, I’ve actually cut back on partying. Which, honestly, has saved me many hungover mornings, so I really should be thanking him.
I hit send on the message, shoving it back into my pocket before downing the rest of my drink. Catching Xander’s eye, I let him know I’m heading inside for a refill. The house has gotten significantly more packed in the short time I’ve been outside, but that’s not all that surprising, seeing as how it’s only getting later. It’s barely ten, and the bodies in here will probably easily multiply by midnight. This sorority in particular is known for its ragers.
Weaving my way through the crowd, I finally make it to the kitchen, and as I’m pouring the vodka into my solo cup, I see him.Nathaniel.He’s on the other side of the kitchen, more toward the dining room, standing around with all of his buddies and a few guys I don’t even recognize, laughing and talking and drinking.
The blood in my body runs ice cold and a pit so deep and so sharp forms in my gut.Why is he here? Did he get off early? Did he text me and maybe I didn’t see it?Grabbing my phone out of my pocket, I pull up our message, and nope. Nothing.
When I glance back up, he still hasn’t spotted me. I watch him in his element for a moment. Maybe he’s about to come find me. Maybe he just arrived and wanted to say hi to his friends first.
That’s a logical idea.
He’s not in his server’s uniform, though.
Maybe he went home to change after his shift that must’ve ended early. The person who couldn’t work, maybe they ended up being able to.
One of the guys I don’t recognize leans in, whispering something in Nathaniel’s ear. I can’t make out what is said obviously, but whatever it is makes Nathaniel grin as he wraps an arm around the guy’s shoulder, dragging him into his side.
The room goes silent. I can’t hear anything, despite knowing the music is on and people are talking all around me. I can’t hear anything other than the sound of my pounding heart in my ears.
Thump, thump, thump.
