Assuming she wants to, that is.
Her brows scrunch together in confusion. “Why on earth would you want to move out of this place?”
“I’m a twenty-something college graduate, Katie. Living on my own would be nice.”
And you know, help me avoid accidentally fucking my mother’s husband on the regular.
“You’re serious about this?” she asks.
“Yes. Do you want to?”
Katie shrugs, an excited smile spreading across her face. “Sure, let’s do it. When do you want to start looking?
“I’m free literally any day,” I deadpan. “So, it’s whenever you’re free.”
She pulls out her phone to check her calendar. “Wednesday I don’t have any shoots going on. Wanna do it then?”
“Works for me. I’ll check out places that are for rent around here tomorrow so we have a game plan.”
**
I told myself I’d go to sleep early tonight. That I wouldn’t give in and do what I really want to do. But as I lie here in my bed, tossing and turning, sleep nowhere in sight, my mind can’t help but latch onto the unanswered text message on my phone. The message that came in about a half an hour ago. The one that said he would be in the media room soon if I wanted to join him for a movie night.
My phone is shoved under my pillow, and it’s burning a hole under there. It’s practically screaming at me to not only pick it up, but to go down there. Nothing good will come from me doing that, though. Because it won’t just be watching a movie, will it? We’ve crossed the line I’ve fought so hard to avoid, and now it feels impossible for me and Zeke to be in the same space alone without something bad happening. We’re drawn to each other.
Right when I wake up tomorrow, I’m starting the apartment slash house hunt. I want to find so many options for us to look at on Wednesday that we have no choice but to find a winner. I need out of this house like yesterday. It’s why I need to go to bed early.
But no surprise, sleep is evading me.
Pulling my phone out from under the pillow, I unlock it, staring at the message from Zeke. Maybe I could go down there simply to talk to him about what happened. Tell him that it can’t happen again. And inform him of my plan to move out. Because as much as he gets under my skin, he deserves to know. I was planning on sitting him and Mom down, and telling them together, but the more I think about it, the more I think it should happen separately.
As much as what happened on the fourth shouldn’t have happened; it did, and he deserves more than being blindsided by my plans when he’s sitting beside his wife and can’t properly react.
So, for that reason, and that reason alone, I kick the covers off and climb out of bed, making my way downstairs. The house is quiet, given the hour. It’s nottoolate, but it is late enough that Mom and Hilda are asleep. Zeke and I seem to be the only night owls in the house—another similarity to him that annoys me.
My heart races in my chest, hands getting clammy as I approach the door, reaching for the handle.
I can do this. I can go in there and talk to him, maturely, without winding up naked.
Chapter Twenty-Six
Elias Carnell
When I step inside the room and round the corner, I actually know the movie he’s watching this time. Either he doesn’t hear me walk in or he’s pretending like he didn’t. Either way, when I plop down on the couch, opposite him, he drags his gaze over to me blankly.
“Pretty Woman, huh?”
“Wow, a movie you actually know. Color me shocked,” he deadpans, returning his attention to Julia Roberts.
Neither of us says anything after that. Both falling into a comfortable silence while we watch it. I pull my legs up, wrapping my arms around my knees, but my body is slightly turned toward him. I know I came down here to talk to him, but I find myself wanting to put it off. This moment is peaceful and… I finally feel content. I don’t want to ruin it. Maybe I can talk to him about everything later. Or tomorrow.
Or maybe avoid it forever, because avoidance is apparently what I do best when it comes to Zeke and my feelings.
I watched this movie once with Katie when we were teenagers. It was one of my favorites for a long time. It fascinated me. For as long as I can remember, I’ve always been enamored with sex workers. The taboo nature of it, of course, but also how beautiful and confident the women always seemed.
And it wasn’t just this movie. I distinctly remember watching a documentary on HBO or Showtime when I was younger about a brothel in Nevada. The Bunny Ranch. How men would come from all over to pay to be with these women. It was thrilling, especially as a pubescent teenage boy.
It’s truthfully not all that shocking I got into sex work myself. And while I don’t have sex for money, what I do is still extremely taboo. Cam websites are very hush-hush among people. Although, I don’t know why.
