My stomach immediately lurches to my throat.What the fuck could he have to ask me, looking that ominous?“Okay…”
Heaving a sigh, he drags a hand down his face before sitting up straighter, doing nothing but making my stomach twist even further. “I need to know if Charles ever… if he ever did anything inappropriate to you.”
My eyebrows shoot straight up as my chest tightens at the sound of Charles’s name. That is the absolute last thing I’d ever think Jules would ask me. He doesn’t even know Charles. “My brother?” is all I manage to get out, my tongue feeling twice the size and my throat coated in chalk.
Instead of responding, he gives me a clipped nod.
“Why are you asking me this?” I hate how shaky my voice sounds.
“Because I need to know, Bodhi. Did he?”
I’ve wondered here or there what it would be like standing beforeJudge van der Meerin a court of law. He’s got this air of assertiveness and dominance about him that I would think would be pretty intimidating in the hot seat. If I had to guess, the way he’s speaking to me now is probably as close as I’ll get to ever finding out. It’s clear he’s not fucking around, and he expects me to be honest.
It’s right there, to lie. It’s how I handled all my problems before, but if I ever want to truly heal and move on, I have to be honest.Especiallywith Jules. I’ve put him through enough, lied about enough. He deserves the truth, and I deserve to speak my truth, no matter how fucking nauseous it makes me.
Glancing around, I make sure no one else is around… which is silly, since we’re on a top floor penthouse suite balcony. My throat is strained, and I don’t think I’ll be able to get this all out without breaking down.
“Yes,” I whisper, eyes already welling up.
Chancing a look at Jules, his eyes are already locked on me, jaw clenched so tight, I’m shocked he doesn’t crack a molar. I know he’s trying to rein in his temper, if the way his nostrils flare is any indication. In a voice much softer than I anticipated, he asks, “Can you please tell me about it?”
“I’ll tell you, but I need to know what brought this up,” I reply. “What caused you to ask this?”
“I met up with Ryan a few weeks ago. He got your letter and wanted to sit down and hash it all out. We ended up talking about your friendship in high school, and he mentioned Charles being a shitty person and some rumors surrounding him.”
I wish I was able to feel glee about Ryan reaching out to his dad right now, but I can’t. I’m too locked on the fact that Charles was brought up. “Rumors about…?”
“His affliction for the underage,” he states with barely contained anger.
Fuck.
Of course, it was always in the back of my mind, wondering if I was the only one Charles did these horrible things to, or if he offered up other minors as payment for debt.
A single tear escapes, falling down my cheek as I focus on evening out my breath and figuring out how to tell him this, the link to all my trauma.
But because Jules is Jules, he’s patient. He lets me take my time getting there, despite how hot the rage is boiling under the surface. He listens as I word vomit years of abuse, holds me when I can’t breathe and when getting anything out is too hard, and then he listens some more.
We sit there for probably close to two hours going through everything, and by the time I get it all out, my eyes are puffy and all dried out. But where I would normally feel numb, I now feel a sense of relief. A weight lifted off my shoulders, knowing that Jules knows all parts of who I am and where I came from and loves me regardless.
Chapter Forty-Three
Jules van der Meer
It’s been a busy few weeks since Bodhi came home. He had to start right away with summer quarter. He was supposed to graduate with the rest of his class, but he was at Blackwood, so the university agreed to let him finish the rest of his credits during the summer quarter so he can graduate by fall.
From the minute Ryan told me about the rumors surrounding Bodhi’s vile, piece of shit brother, I’ve been on high alert, trying to find out anything I can on him. Especially since Bodhi finally confided in me the details of what he went through. I can’t remember a single time in my life when I felt as murderous as I did when he told me everything.
I hired a private investigator the next day when I got home from the hotel. Someone as sick, twisted, and impulsive as Charles will have left a trail somewhere. Even if it’s damn near impossible to find. I know in my gut, it’s there, and I won’t stop until I find it and get him behind bars for what he did to Bodhi.
The PI just called with some huge information, so I’m on my way to Bodhi’s house to fill him in. He doesn’t know about any of this. I didn’t want to tell him and get his hopes up, only for it to come up cold. But with what I just learned, I feel more confident than ever that we’ll get him.
My phone lights up, a call from Bodhi. He didn’t answer when I first called, letting him know I was coming. I think he was finishing up class. Hitting answer, it connects to my car stereo.
“Hey, you home?” I ask.
“I’m about to be. Why?”
“I’m on my way over. I’ve got something to talk to you about.”
