Amy picked up the muffin and unwrapped the rest of it. “Not in those exact words, but yes, they pretty much think I’m useless too. And they’re not wrong. I’m seventy-one, and I have no job. I don’t even know what I’m going to do when I run out of savings.”
Being frugal and living sparsely wasn’t going to make the money last forever, no matter how much she wanted it to.
Amy had a few more months before she had to figure everything out, and until then, she wanted to bury her head in the sand and pretend her problems didn’t exist. After years spent living in survival mode, Amy didn’t want to worry about the future or drive herself crazy wondering what was going to happen next.
“I’m sure your kids can help,” Emily offered, a shadow settling over her face. “It’s what family does.”
Amy tore off a piece of the muffin and shoved it into her mouth, her lips lifting into a half-smile at the burst of flavor. “Maybe they’d help me out financially, but I couldn’t ask them.They’ve got their own families and financial obligations to worry about.”
Emily searched Amy’s face. “So, you’re not going to tell them at all?”
Amy paused with another piece of muffin halfway to her lips. “Well, no. When the time comes, I’ll see how I feel about it, but until then, I don’t see the point of bothering them with this. It’s not like they’d pay much attention anyway.”
“I don’t understand.”
“Sylvie and Lucas have their own lives. It’s been like that pretty much since they graduated college. There’s always something to do or somewhere to be, so they’re not around as often.”
If it weren’t for the constant updates, Amy wondered if they’d know much about her life at all.
But she didn’t begrudge them any of it, not when she knew they were happy and healthy.
What more could she possibly want for her children?
Emily reached across the table and took Amy’s hand in hers. “I’m sure if they knew the truth, they wouldn’t hesitate to be there, front row center.”
Amy shrugged. “I don’t know. I don’t think I’d know what to do if they paid too much attention to me.”
Emily snorted. “I can tell you how that feels. Charlotte and Savannah are the complete opposite, especially since their father died. They hover so much, I tease them about how I’m the parent.”
Amy squeezed Emily’s hands. “I’m sure it’s nice having them around like that.”
“It is, but it also makes me miss Trevor more.” Emily withdrew her hand and sighed. “I love my daughters, I do, but I know they can’t fill the Trevor-sized hole in my heart. No one can.”
“I don’t think anyone is meant to,” Amy offered with an exhale. “I think you just learn to live with the grief until, one day, it doesn’t hurt as much.”
“And you learn to grow around it,” Emily mused in a softer voice. “Yeah, I guess you’re right.”
“Things don’t always end up the way we want them to, huh?”
Emily stood up. “Not even close. Do you want something else?”
Amy glanced up and patted her stomach. “You’re definitely going to make me gain some weight.”
“You’d look so much better with a little meat on your bones,” Emily teased with a quick look over her shoulders. “I’ve got to get back.”
“I’ll see you at support group tonight?”
Emily nodded and gave her a genuine smile. “Absolutely.”
Hours later, Amy was standing off to the side, on the far side of the church basement, near a large bay window that overlooked the lush green backyard. Through the wrought iron gates, she spotted rows and rows of identical-looking gray buildings that looked like they’d seen better days. Emily raced down the stairs a while later with only a few short minutes to spare.
The two of them embraced, and Amy was about to make a comment when another pair of footsteps descended. Then, a second pair joined them, revealing two men, one of them with stubble and laugh lines on his face. The other had one hand shoved into the pocket of his jeans and the other tugging on the edge of his shirt. Both of them wore dark-colored sneakers.
As one, they moved and selected seats in the last row.
Amy sat two rows ahead and laced her fingers through Emily’s.
Halfway through the meeting, she pretended to stretch her arms over her head and spun around, spotting the duo easily.The older man sat there, a look of fierce concentration etched onto his face. Next to him, the boy was fidgeting and unable to sit still long enough for any of it to make a difference.
