“Babe, we’re not going for easy here—we’re going forawesome. Case closed. Decision made. I saw the look in your eye when I said Hawaii, and I’m in the fantasy-fulfillment business, remember? Hawaii it is.”
I open my mouth to protest.
“It’s settled. It’s an easy five-hour flight from the west coast; it’s still the U.S. but it feels like a faraway tropical paradise; and you saidyour family’s never been. Just give me your list and we’ll make it happen. Easy peasy.”
I pause. “Seriously?”
“Yeah.”
“And you really think we can pull this off just eight weeks from now?”
“Of course. This is exactly why I pay T-Rod an ungodly amount of money. I get the crazy ideas and she makes ’em happen. She’ll find us a venue—you really can’t go wrong anywhere in Hawaii, so we’ll let her pick which island and resort depending on availability. And if we have to do it mid-week or something to book a good place on such short notice, we’ll do it. Bada-bing-bada-boom.”
I squeal. “Okay. If you really think we can pull it off. Wow. That’s exciting. Done.” I clap my hands together.
“Shit, that was easy,” Josh says. “That was like planning a wedding with a dude.”
“I told you right from the start—I’m an honorary dude.”
Josh snorts. “Yeah, yet another big ol’ steaming pile of bullshit brought to you by Katherine Ulla Morgan.” He snorts again. “Yousaidthat, but it didn’t turn out to bequiteas true as the brochure promised.”
I want to be pissed, but it’s impossible. I laugh heartily.
“So you got any must-haves?” Josh asks. “Speak now or forever hold your peace. Time’s already tickin’.”
I think for a minute. “Well, I definitely wanna wear a pretty white dress. I don’t care if I’m pregnant, I’m still your virgin-bride, right?”
“Absolutely. I’ve never fucked you as Mrs. Faraday before. That’s virgin enough for me.”
“And I want my family and best friends there, of course.” I twist my mouth, considering. “If we’re doing this in Hawaii, then I’d like to get married on a beach at sunset, right on the sand. And I don’t wanna wear shoes. I think it’d be hilarious if I were barefoot and pregnant.”
Josh laughs. “Awesome.”
“You like that idea?” I ask.
“Of course. I love it. Why wouldn’t I?”
“Because if we’re gonna do a beach-on-the-sand-thing, you can’t really wear one of your fancy suits.”
“Whoa, whoa, whoa. Them’s fighting words, babe. Why the fuck not? I’m wearing a tux to my wedding, no matter where it is. If it’s on the beach, I won’t wear shoes—but I’m wearing a goddamned tuxedo to my own wedding. I’m thegroom.”
I giggle. “Sorry, Playboy. Momentary insanity on my part.”
“Jesus,” Josh says, mock-glaring at me. “Don’t even joke about me not getting my dream wedding.”
I laugh.
“We gotta look like the bride and groom on top of a wedding cake.”
I laugh again. “Wow, you’ve actually thought about this, haven’t you?”
“Hey, I know,” Josh says, his eyes lighting up. “Why don’t we have everyone go barefoot? The theme can be black-tie barefoot-and-pregnant.”
“Dude, you should be a party planner. It’s brillz.”
“Yeah, I’m liking this,” Josh says, his eyes sparkling. “What else, Party Girl?”
“I’d like to have a kick-ass band at the reception. Dancing is definitely one of my bridezilla demands.”
