“Oh God, no, Will,” Carmen says, putting her hand on Will’s forearm. “Honey, no. Please.”
Will laughs and takes another bite of his food. “Don’t worry, Car. I’ll just get it on my ass, like my boy here. A little barbed wire on my ass for you and no one else.” He laughs.
“There you go,” Josh says, laughing. “Genius. It’s just skin, right?” He takes a bite of his steak.
“Fuck yeah,” Will agrees. “I’m totally gonna do it. We’re all a pile of skin and bones sooner or later. That’s what gets me going every fucking day, knowing I’m running out of time.”
“Amen,” Josh says. “Hey, maybe I’ll join you—add a little barbed wire to my dragon’s neck, maybe?”
“Hey, great idea,” Will says. “I’ll totally add barbed wire to my dragon.”
“Jesus Christ,” Reed says. “Will, stop listening to Josh Faraday of all people about tattoos. Listen to him about everything else, because the guy’s a fucking genius, just not about tattoos.”
“Shut the fuck up,” Josh says. “I’m wise and powerful aboutallthings, including tattoos.”
“Don’t do it,” Reed says to Will.
“Dude, Reed’s using reverse psychology on you,” Henn warns Will. “He’s being the puppet master.”
“No, I’m not. I’m sincerely tellingWillnot to do it,” Reed says. “Althoughyoushould absolutely do it, Faraday. Add yet another stupid tattoo to your stupid collection.”
“My collection isn’t stupid,” Josh says. “Didn’t you hear a damned thing Will and I were just saying? Even the stupid ones areprofound,man. We’relivingcanvases,Reed.Duh. We’reartistsandart,all at the same time.”
“Yeah, Reed. We’reliving canvases,” Will agrees with solemnity.“We’re artists and art, all at the same time. We’re living performance art and our tattoos are our way of flipping the bird tomortality.”
“That’s right,” Josh says emphatically. “Getting barbed wire would be like saying, ‘Mortality, fuck you. You might be gunning for me, but you’ll have to get through my barbed wire to getme, motherfucker. Raaaaah.’”
Reed rolls his eyes.
“So lemme get this straight, boss,” Henn says, pursing his lips like he’s considering something very serious. “You got YOLO stamped on yourassbecause you were flipping the bird tomortality?”
Josh laughs. “Absolutely. Now, when the Grim Reaper comes for my ass, maybe he’ll see it and stop and say, ‘Never mind.’”
Everyone laughs.
Carmen leans into me. “Josh is hilarious,” she whispers.
I nod and bite my lip. “He sure is.”
Josh swigs his drink happily. Man, he’s having fun tonight.
“Okay, okay, I cannot tell a lie,” Josh is saying. “I must admit, I wasn’t thinking deep and profound thoughts about my mortality when I got YOLO stamped on my ass. I wasn’t thinking much of anything, actually. I was just a twenty-year-old asswipe who thought he knew everything.”
“Aw, don’t be too hard on yourself,” Reed says. “All twenty-year-old dudes are asswipes who think they know everything. I know I was.”
“How old are you, Will?” I ask.
“Twenty-three,” he replies. “And I don’t think I know everything.”
“Well, I thought I knew everything when I was twenty-three,” Reed says, shaking his head. “Turns out I sure had a whole lot to learn between twenty and thirty.”
“Ditto,” Henn agrees. “Jesus, has it really been ten years since Josh got his stupid YOLO tat? Oh my shit, we’re getting old.”
“Remember when thirty sounded so old?” Reed says, looking wistful.
Josh nods. “I never thought I’d make it to thirty.”
“Really?” I ask, the hair on my arms standing up. “Doesn’t everyone think they’re gonna live to a hundred and three?”
