“That wasn’t part of our deal,” I said.
His face softened, and he hesitated for a quick moment before he said, “You know, I’ve got my own story about that day, actually.”
My eyes snapped up to his. “Really?”
“Mhmm.” He nodded. “But it actually starts half a year after my sister left. I was scared and alone, so I left too. My first destination was the coast she loved so much, and my only goals were to draw full time and find a way to let my sister know I was out there waiting for her. That's how my first tattoo shop came to be.”
I felt my mouth dry out. “Where?”
“Portland, Maine,” he said, eyes tracking my expression. “That one was just Mar Tattoo.”
Instantly, I understood. He wanted to create spaces Mar could find him in. Places she would want to come back to. Places he was creating in cities she could love rather than just the company they grew up in.
I swallowed. “And next?”
“Next Cape Cod. And after that, North Carolina, then South, and finally Seaside, Rhode Island.” he said, eyes pinning me to my spot. “Fast forward to that same day, and I’m in my shop thinking it’s about time I find a new place to go.”
A hitched breath escaped me as I hung on his words. He slid his hand behind my neck to keep me close. Voice lowering like he was telling me his greatest secret. “I’m sitting in my shop on a totally normal day, when in walks this living angel, I swear to God. Everything about her is calling to me. Her beauty, her smile, her eyes. And cause I’m an idiot—I say something stupid right away, and you know what she does? She lays me out, right there. Sets me straight in the cutest way and proceeds tokeepdoing it for the rest of the year. I was a goner then and there sweetheart.”
I gave him a look, not totally convinced.
“I made a promise to myself when I left home that I’d keep moving. Keep opening places that might attract Mar until I physically couldn’t anymore. And I was doing it. I had a system of everytwo years. Just enough time to get another business off the ground and more than enough time to find her if she wanted to be found.” He paused as he looked at me, willing me to see something in his words. When I didn’t, he said, “I was already in Seaside for two years when I met you, Alta.”
My eyes went wide as saucers and I looked at him confused, yet not.
“Harper?” I whispered.
“I was planning on going to New York next. Upstate somewhere.” His hand came up to cup my cheeks, his face coming back down to be near mine. “And then an angel walked into my shop, and I’m still here instead.”
“Harper,” I breathed, shocked he’d never told me any of this. Floored that I’d affected him even then. Vindicated that I freakingknewit! My laugh was so watery as I bubbled. “All this time?”
“Thewholetime, baby,” he said. “I’m an idiot, Alta. I say idiot things and apparently do them too. But I have loved you since I laid eyes on you. In different ways. In ways I didn’t understand, in ways that scared me, and now in ways I don’t ever want to let go.”
I have no idea when my hands slid into his shirt, but I was fisting it now. Gripping it in a stranglehold to keep him as close as possible. To never let him go either. “Harper.”
“I’m sorry?—”
“You don’t have to say?—”
“No. Let me say this,” he insisted. “I’m sorry I let my fear get in the way of us. I’m sorry about what I said, the way I treated you. I didn’t lie, I did need time, but you still deserved more from me.”
“The truth is with you and my family, it’s really hard for me to be fearless because I’m so terrified of losing you. I think after Mar, I’ll always be afraid of losing people I love. And when things were tested between us, I got scared,” he continued. “But I don’t want to do that anymore. I don’t want to waste life and love just because I’m afraid I’ll lose it one day.”
My eyes held his, my body sucking up every emotion he was putting off, taking it all in.
Taking a huge breath, I straightened up and looked at him with my newfound negotiation face on. I’d been quite busy with my family on Harper’s behalf lately. “It looks like we need to make another deal, Augustus Harper.”
His eyebrows climbed his face. “Another one?”
“Yep, we broke our old deal but never set a new one and it jinxed us. We’re not making the same mistake twice,” I said.
He smiled. “Alright then. What’s the deal?”
“That you’re mine, Harper.” The guffaw he let slip brought a mischievous smile to my face. “Yep. All mine. To do what I want with, forever and ever.”
“Oh yeah?” he said, his grin splitting his entire face even as he shook his head.
“Yeah,” I said. “And if you would have just told me how you were feeling before, I would have told you that there was nothing to be afraid of. Because you couldn’t shake me off if you tried. So what do you say? Be mine? Is that a deal?”
