Ceci, whose sharp eyes assessed Jenny and then cut up to me, waited only until I nodded my head and shrugged to look back at our instructor with a barely resigned glare. “I guess but be gentle. He’s sensitive.”
The class laughed but my mind only zeroed in on one thing. She didn’t correct her from calling me“her guy”.
I stole another pinch on Ceci’s hip before I made my way up front to be used as a puppet for this woman’s classroom. She positioned me to face her so both our sides were to the class. Then she told me to grab onto her wrist like I was trying to yank her along with me. Initially I hesitated, not wanting to yank any woman, class or not, but she insisted. So, with caution, I grabbed her. Her skin felt cold compared to Ceci’s warmth. Wrong instead of right. Making me miss her touch almost reactively.
“This is what you’ll do if someone tries to grab your arm or wrist from in front of you,” she said. “First step, like every other move, is to not panic and to try to take control back from the controller. In this scenario, taking control doesn’t mean pull away. That might throw you off balance and put you into an even more vulnerable position.” She demonstrated the incorrect way first.
“Instead, you want to grab firmly onto their hand, lock that positionovertheir fingers or knuckles, and then you are going to swing both yoursandtheir arms so that theirs is now hyperextended behind their back, putting you in control once again. Once you have that position, simply push. This will force them to their knees or into a submissive position in which you can disengage and run.”
As she spoke she acted out every motion. Pressing down on my fingers to a point where I had to loosen my grip. Twisting my arm behind me so unnaturally that it was uncomfortable to the point of pain. And pushing on the hold to the point where I had no other choice than to lower down to my knees. It was demobilizing and even with our uneven size matchup, I had to admit, she had me.
Loud enough that everyone could hear, I said, “Uncle.”
The class laughed, but as she let me go I noticed that Ceci had drifted slightly forward, her face pinched as she watched the exchange closely. Attempting at levity and getting that worried look off her face, I gave her a wink. Her mouth only pulled up slightly, but the smile didn’t meet her eyes. Eyes that were looking kind of weird.
“Ceci, you seem to be picking things up quickly. Why don’t you join us up front for your run through, so the class can watch if they get stuck. Everyone else, try this out with your partners,” Jenny said.
The class broke out in a series of movements. Some smooth and some sloppy. Grunts and groans and huffs of effort sounding all around us. In the middle of it, Ceci wasn’t moving.
No one else noticed, everyone preoccupied with getting their positions right. The instructor moving from pair to pair, commenting or correcting when necessary. But I noticed, and it wasn’t like her to get shy. I mean she’d all but begged me to yank her ponytail earlier in front of everyone, but now, she was frozen to her spot?
My touch made her jump as I grasped her elbows. Further evidence that she was not okay.
“What’s wrong?” I asked immediately.
She shook her head, a trance lifting and her throat bobbing as she swallowed. “Nothing. Let’s just go up there.”
“Okay.” I followed, not believing her.
Up front, Ceci turned to me and tried to say casually, “I should grab you this time. I’ve been hogging all the demos.”
This further solidified my suspicions. For all her trying, she was not pulling off the nonchalance she was going for. Instead she seemed jumpy and skittish all of a sudden.
“Um, no,” I said, and when she frowned up at me, I went on. “You gain way more from practicing on me than I do on you.”
Biting her lip, she glanced around us.
“C’mon.” I grabbed her shoulders and turned her toward me. “Just you and me, like always. Last one, then we can get pancakes or something.”
“I’m not a kid. You don’t have to bribe me with sweets,” she grumbled.
I leveled a look at her.
“I’m not bribing you with anything. I was going to get you something either way. You’re doing well, so you deserve a reward.” I continued to look down at her, watching her amber eyes for signs and cues. She was lashing out because she was nervous about something. Uncomfortable. But I wanted her to work through that. That’s what we came here to do. So sliding a slow hand up and down her arm I said. “Just do this last thing for me and then I’ll spoil you with all the treats you can eat, alright?”
“Like a dog?” she asked, and my heart panged at the reminder of our first day as friends. At how far we’d come from there, basically strangers then to now knowing each other inside and out. To doing anything for each other.
I grinned for more than one reason, my heart feeling achy but in a good way. Still I kept my voice light, sarcastic even and said, “Exactly, Sparky. Now be a good girl and finish this up.”
Her eyes did something funny, they traveled from mine to flick down my body ever so softly before she yanked them back up. Smiling softly, she nodded a little weakly and backed up into her position.
Every other time I moved for her throughout the class, she was ready. Counting her movements under her breath as she acted out the instructions from our teacher. This time, as I moved to grab her arm, she jerked back. And hell if that movement and the look of fear on her face didn’t tear me apart.
She looked genuinely afraid.Of me.It had me straightening up and thinkingfuck this class.
“What’s wrong?” I asked again. She opened her mouth to answer but one look at her face had me cutting her off, adding. “And no bullshit, please.”
She closed her mouth and looked around us again. She was being weird.
