He brought me close for an embrace. Skin on skin. I tucked my face into the crook of his neck. Soothing strokes down my back. “You do, Zosia.”
I shook my head, dismayed by my own shyness.
“You give amazing hand jobs,” Lorcan whispered, “I’ve been on the receiving end of a few.”
I laughed nervously. “I barely know what I’m doing.”
“You have a few weeks to get comfortable, Princess. After that, you’re on notice.” He laid me down and covered me with his body. Letting me take his weight. “We have a lot of wasted time to make up for.”
I reminded myself that it’s okay to enjoy this; safe to explore. He’s not going to leave me feeling more like an object than a person. I’m still more comfortable where he can’t see me, though. That isn’t going to change overnight.
But we’ll keep trying until it does.
* * *
September slid into October. Upon their return, the Knauss family spent a few extra days at the castle, beyond the time I had already granted them. I showed them my new indoor garden, though I omitted any mention of its prototype: the mushrooms I cultivated when food began to run out last spring. That phytology class I took in Scotland kept me alive.
They loved meeting Lorcan. It was hard to say who had the biggest crush on him, Mrs. Knauss or the daughter with the boyfriend, who seemed to be abruptly and conveniently out of the picture.
During my absence, Palla returned to her sleeping quarters with Bennet. Tahra treated Lorcan with frosty disdain, which he took in stride.
He began a new habit of cornering me at unexpected moments. It’s the way we might have started if there hadn’t been princess and knight, watched and bound on all sides by tradition and gossip, if Raina hadn’t been a factor at the beginning of our forced proximity. If people hadn’t been getting in our way for the entirety of our relationship.
Lorcan seemed determined to block any further interference.
Within a week, it got to the point where I couldn’t pass him in the castle halls without my face flaming. Often, he would catch me around the waist and pull me in for a kiss until I tried to wriggle away—his favorite attack if I happen upon him when he’s sweaty from training. If I’m busy, he’ll glide past me with a light touch on my arm or back. Sometimes, he lets me pass by with little more than a heated exchange of glances that sets my every nerve on high alert. I know he’s plotting to pull me into a darkened corner and kiss me—unless I manage to sneak up on him first.
My knowledge of every secret passageway and hidden nook in this old ruin once saved my life. Now, it gave me a slight advantage over my competitive fiancé. Occasionally, I managed to sneak up on him. A dangerous game; twice, he came close to stabbing me when I caught him off-guard. Quick reflexes had one disadvantage.
Our game of pin-the-princess-to-the-nearest-hard-surface quickly put an end to any lingering rumors that the wedding was only for show.
Otherwise, the days passed in a blur of work. There are priests and priestesses to corral—not many, but someone has to do the honors of conducting our wedding and coronation ceremonies. With no living relative to perform the vows, I asked Rya and Saskaya to share the responsibility.
There were provisions to secure, not only for the annual harvest festival and wedding feast, but for winter, too. Staff to hire. Orphans to try and connect with any remaining family, or provide for if we couldn’t locate living relatives. There were a heartbreaking number of the latter.
Scarlett took on an increasing share of administrative work, including everything outward facing. There were a frightening few days when Humayun managed to get our foreign accounts frozen, but that was quickly walked back after the Knauss family posted a zillion photos of themselves with Hallie, Laila, and Cyrus having the time of their lives in Oceanside. It’s hard to argue that your daughter has been kidnapped when she’s posting selfies about how this place would be paradise, if not for all the sharks.
Lorcan came in one evening to find me falling asleep while trying to rebalance the ledgers. Again. Everything is pinched and stretched. I can only hope Rya’s plan to tax vendors and sell licenses at the Autumn Harvest Festival will put enough daels in our coffers to get through the next few months.
“If you’re going to work this hard, Zosia, you should at least be working on something that matters.”
“Auralia matters, Lorcan. Something you should keep in mind, considering you’ll have a new title soon.” The one he’ll start using soon: King Protector, our equivalent to Prince Consort. It will take getting used to, for both of us.
He kisses me and plucks the ledger from my hands. “Do your schoolwork.”
Ipfft. “I’m never getting that damn degree.”
“I will, if you will.”
The mattress dipped as he crawled into the bed beside me.
“You don’t care about finishing your degree.” I did, for I saw it as a means of gaining a measure of respect I didn’t have at home. An education was something I would earn on my own merits, as Zosia, not the princess. Me.
What do my personal ambitions matter, now?
“No. But you do.” Lorcan smiled gently and brushed a strand of hair away from my face. “We were a team then. If you still want your degree, you should have it. Passing the last few tests wouldn’t take much effort.”
“Unlike a certain gifted knight, I don’t have an eidetic memory. It’ll take me longer than it would you. A lot longer.” I yawned.
