Would knowing the answers to these questions really bring me peace?
Now that the idea is in my head, though, I can’t shake it. If Father really didn’t do it, then who did?
Was it the person who found her body? Is that why they knew where to look? Were they coming back for her… or me?
A new terror blooms in my chest, so shocking that it makes the tears dry up. I stare at the headstone, my hands gripping the grass beneath my knees.
Leopold’s kill squad… Kit ran with them. I heard rumors of things they did in the alpha’s name, but I never believed it.
Oh, God! What if—
“Lexa?”
I almost jump out of my skin when I hear Kit’s voice. Shock and fear race through me, and all I can do is stare up at him, my body frozen, all my accusations locked in my chest.
Would he really lie to me about this? Would he take everything I had, then brutally dump me in front of his family… and then… and then kill my mother?
“Lexa,” he says again. There is so much genuine care and warmth in his voice, I can’t point any blame at him.
But he knows something. He knows she was found, and buried. I need to know more…
“Are you okay?” he asks, sitting down next to me. “I mean, I know you’re not, but is there anything I can do for you?”
Yes… answer all my fucking questions!
I shake my head slowly, still staring at the headstone. Kit takes a breath and pauses as if he wants to ask me something, but he doesn’t say anything, and the moment passes.
“I’m here,” he says. “Anything you need, just tell me.”
I nod slowly, crumpling slowly as I start to cry again. He puts his arms around me, and I let him, staying tense at first, but eventually falling against his broad, strong chest and clinging to his shoulders as sobs shake through me.
I remember this feeling from that night I spent in his arms. I’d never felt so safe. I had so much hope for the future. It was like everything in my life was finally coming together, and I didn’t have to fear the past anymore.
Kit rocks me gently, stroking my hair, and I gasp through my sobs as I try to calm myself down. The magic between our bodies is undeniable, and having him so close is doing things to me.
It would be so easy to let go. I want to love him. It’s all I ever wanted.
But the ugly questions in my mind come back, and even if I could put aside my suspicions, I know I can’t ever forgive the way he dumped me.
It would have been bad enough if I went into it as a silly fling, but I didn’t. I gave him my heart and soul that night, and he threw it away.
“Get off,” I mutter, shoving him. He falls on his butt next to me, and I pick myself up, dusting the grass off my hands as I take a few steps back.
Kit looks up at me with wide eyes, as if he’s afraid of me.
Looking away, I wipe my nose, sniffling a bit as I try to get myself under control. I hear him stand up, but he doesn’t try to get close to me. A shadow falls on us, and when I look up, I’m shocked to see the sun sinking below the horizon.
“It’s late,” I whisper.
“Not that late,” Kit says. “The sun sets early in Wolfshade.”
I nod, looking at my mother’s gravestone.
I don’t want to look at him. I’m scared of what I see in his eyes.
“Thank you for telling me she was here,” I say. “It’s a relief to me, to know that she was taken care of.”
“You left town so suddenly, and no one could find you. I didn’t even know if you knew she died.”
