Luke
Iwake up from our nap to the sweet sound of Olivia singing. I’m lying flat on my stomach, mouth covered in drool, and I open one eye to peer around the dark space. The only light in the room is coming from the bathroom. I lift up until I can see her hair bobbing as she sways her hips, singing along to the tune of a song.
I push myself into a seated position and fluff a few pillows before leaning back against them. I place my hands behind my head, cross my ankles together, and relax so I can enjoy the view. A smirk lifts my lips as Olivia twists around and catches me watching her.
“Someone woke up all holly jolly,” I say.
A smile breaks across her face as she continues to sing the lyrics to me. She’s watching me from the mirror again, a slow grin appearing on her face as her eyes begin tracing over the contours of my body before holding my gaze. I catch something behind her eyes, something I’ve only dreamt of seeing, and it has me pushing up from the bed and moving to her.
I stop just a few inches away, wanting to reach out and touch her but not knowing if I can or should. I decide to twist around so I can lean my backside against the counter and face her. I cross my arms, noticing how she eyes my biceps, and her grin transforms into a smirk.
If this is how I could wake up every day for the rest of my life, I would be a very lucky man. I’ve been an idiot to deny myself this truth, that I’m stupidly in love with Olivia Gray. All I want for Christmas is the chance to be with her.Reallybe with her.
“What?” she asks, the smile slowly dropping away from her face.
I shrug my shoulders, my smile growing.
“Why are you looking at me like that?” She quirks a brow, using the same words as yesterday, but this time her voice wavers ever so slightly.
I’ve never made her nervous before. I’m not sure what to do with this new discovery or the best way to act that won’t send her running, because now I’m wondering how I’m looking at her and what she might see written in my expression or hidden within my eyes.
What if one more glance might give everything away?
“Like what?” My voice is casual, but my thoughts are the complete opposite.
“I’m not sure,” she adds, returning her attention to the mirror to start applying lip gloss to her perfect full lips. Just the mere sight of them sends a shock of desire through me.
“Do you not like how I’m looking at you?” I decide to ask.
She holds her breath as she ponders for a moment. “I don’t mind it.” Her expression softens, like melting snow, as the confession drifts in the room.
I want to admit to her that I’ve always looked at her like this. I’ve just tried to hide it when she notices. I want to tell her that anytime she’s in the same room as me, my eyesalwaysgravitate to her. I told myself that I could handle this fake relationshipbecause, over the years, I had mastered the art of pretending.
Every smile, every laugh, every time she tucks her hair behind her ear and looks at me like I am her whole world…it’s been slowly chipping away at my control. Icravemore with her, but taking that next step with Olivia means risking everything.
I suspect that Olivia sees the truth behind my eyes when she says, “I need to finish getting ready, or we’ll be late.”
“Yeah, okay.” I keep the truth locked up behind my smile, not sure how much of my heart I should bare to her, and attempt to convince myself that being her fake boyfriend is enough. Even if it isn’t.
“Took you long enough. Where’s Olivia?” Jerrica complains while searching behind me as I enter the living room.
“We took a nap like everyone else did.” I shrug my shoulders. “She’s almost ready.”
“Nonni’s lasagna will put anyone into a coma,” Aunt Andy admits, patting her stomach, a smile tugging on her red lips.
Everyone is dressed in festive clothes, wearing different shades of red and green. Joyful smiles fill everyone's face except Uncle Leo’s, who looks like he’s being held against his will right now. It makes me chuckle. I find my dad amongst the crowd, being wheeled toward me, and the seasonal joy is sucked away instantly.
“You look nice,” he says, peering up at me happily, and I’m not sure how I’m supposed to act toward him. My stomach clenches every time I’m around him, a reflex I haven’t outgrown since I was a child. I can still hear the echo of slammed doors, still feel the silence that used to stretch for days between us.
Now, I have to pretend like none of that mattered, andthere is still a part of me where it feels like a betrayal—to myself, to the kid who used to wait up for apologies that never came—but I’m trying. Not for my dad, really, but for myself. I want to stop carrying the heavy weight from the past and let go of the bitterness, even just a little. So, I smile, give him a nod, all while swallowing the heat that rises in my throat every time our eyes meet.
This isn’t quite forgiveness, but maybe it’s the start of something that can lead there. Eventually.
My dad parts his lips to say something, but my attention is stolen as I spot Olivia speed-walking toward us. She halts as she takes in my dad and me. Her brows furrow together, as if asking if I’m okay, although I’m anything but okay.
“You look beautiful,” I say without thinking, admiring her as she moves closer to me. She’s wearing a cream-colored sweater that looks as silky as her skin, a light-pink skirt, black leggings underneath, and brown booties. Her hair is down, the waves falling past her shoulders and down her back.
A blush creeps into her cheeks, acting as the perfect distraction from the turmoil I was experiencing before seeing her. I want to lean in and press my lips to them, to enjoy her warmth and memorize how it feels to know that I put it there. I reach for her hand.
