Her bottom lip is tucked between her teeth as she restrains herself from giggling, and all I want to do is reach over and run my thumb across her mouth. I want to hear her laugh for the rest of my life. I don’t know how she does it, but she always brings a light with her everywhere she goes. And it’s refreshing to see after the past few heavy weeks we’ve had.
It’s crazy to think that Raine and I have been best friendsfor three years now. The first moment that I met her at the Wiley farm, something in me became lost in her. I think it took some time, but after we spent a few months getting to know one another, my heart started to feel more for her. I found myself falling in love with her.
It’s more than just three words that I ache to say to her. It’s the way I always seem to laugh harder when I’m with her. It’s how I feelmorewhen she’s around. It’s trusting her with me—the real me. It’s how she’s the first person I think about in the morning and who my thoughts drift off to during the night.
I want to be her friend—the friend she falls hopelessly in love with. As I watch her face light up with a smile, the reflection of the sun in her eyes, the wind blowing pieces of her hair, I want to tell her that—that my heart is full from the love I have for her.
“I mean, where do I even begin?” I laugh.
She shoves against my shoulder, shaking her head but giving me a soft smile.
We make it to the dock and stand next to one another, looking out over the still lake. Not a boat is in sight with it being in the middle of winter. I always like this time of year, when the lake is silent and layered with white fluffy snow.
“Okay. Maybe it means…” I begin, keeping my eyes on the water as I try to explain what I’m feeling inside. “No matter what we’re doing in life, even when life gets a little crazy, we’ll always have each other. We’ll always be happy when we’re together.”
I reach over, feeling brave, and run my hands down her arm until I can lace our fingers together. I look at her, watching her smile slowly fade as she watches our hands become one. I wonder if she feels the prickle of energy up her arm in the same way that I do?
“Only you could find something meaningful in an unexplainable dream like that,”she whispers.
“Only you can make me feel happy when life is full of chaos.”
Her eyes dance with mine before rolling down my face and landing on my lips. She stands there in silence, snowflakes gathering in the strands of her hair, and I realize I’ve never been more sure about something as I am at this moment.
I lean toward her, keeping our hands tightly wrapped together, and I press my lips against hers. Our eyes flutter closed at the same time, and I use my free hand to reach up and slide a strand of her hair behind her ear, gripping the side of her face to bring her lips harder against my own. She takes in a deep breath before pulling away.
“Ry,” she says breathlessly.
“I’m in love with you, Rainbow.”
Her gray-blue eyes widen with shock at my sudden confession, but I can tell by the way her lips turn up into a grin, revealing the dimple that always drives me crazy, that she already knew. I think we’ve both known for a while now but were just too scared to admit it to one another. Too fearful of messing up the friendship we’ve built.
“Who knew all it would take was for me to dream about licking kittens for you to admit that you love me.”
Raine is looking at me differently now, all droopy-eyed and parting lips, heavy breaths and a blush coloring her cheeks. It feels like honey dripping inside of me, warm and liquid, pooling in all the places that I’m absolutely desperate for her.
“There have been so many times that I wanted to kiss you,” I admit out loud, my eyes landing on her lips again.
“Like in the stairwell the other day?” she says, the words a mere whisper in the wind around us.
“Yeah,” That one word is all the encouragement she needs. Raine wraps her arms around me and pulls me closer.
“I love you too.”
Raine smashes her lips against my own with no sweet introduction. No gentle learning. Instead, she reaches up, scratchesher nails into my hair, and tugs me closer. There’s a certain demand in the way her mouth works against my own. She kisses me like she’s hungry, like she’s been dreaming of me the same way I’ve been dreaming about her.
Kissing Raine has never felt more right than in this moment, on the dock where we’ve shared many memories, with her wrapped tightly in my arms. Our touches are careless; every point of contact between us feels important.
We hear the sound of a car door shutting which snaps us both back into reality. We separate but refuse to hide the happiness written on our faces. I wish I would’ve done this sooner. A seed of gratification takes root in my chest and blooms, spreading throughout my body.
“We should check on Nan,” she says, keeping her hand entwined with my own.
We hold each other’s hands and jog toward the cabins. Raine’s giggle rings out, and it sounds like music—the kind you can only get in nature, the kind that feels like peace. From the look on Raine’s face as she looks over at me and smiles, I know she feels it too.
We see Pops’ truck outside of the cabin and make our way inside. We were only gone for maybe thirty minutes, but I feel guilty for being caught away from Nan when I told him I would look after her.
“We were letting her rest,” is the first thing I say when both Earl and Pops turn to see us shedding our jackets at the front door.
“I told them to go outside and let an old lady get some shuteye, but I couldn’t sleep.” I peer behind Pops to see Nan wide awake with a cardboard box opened beside her. “Come here, Raine. I want to give you something.”
