He directed his focus back at the laptop yet I could see he was pretending to look at the screen while watching Torin peripherally.
Torin picked up the banana, honestly looking at it as if he had never seen one before. He peeled off the sticker, and flicked his hand having trouble getting it off his finger. Then he wiped it onto his pants.
He grasped both ends of the banana, pulling, squeezing, and attempting to break it in half, but instead causing it to split open and the ripe banana to squeeze out all over his hands.
He frowned.
Cooper’s eyes were narrowed.
I picked up a banana and peeled it. Torin wiped his hands on his napkin, grimacing. “Och nae, I did not do this right.”
I said, “Dump yours here in his bag, don’t worry about it.” I cut the banana in half and put it in his bowl and passed it to him.
Cooper said, “Am I to understand that you’ve never seen a banana before? You have no idea what it is and how to peel it?”
Torin asked, “This is a bana? Then, aye, I hae never seen one before.” He used the spoon to take a bite of banana. “Tis verra good!” Then he took a taste of the ice cream. “Och aye, this is delicious!” He took another bigger bite and another, with his mouth full, “Och, I need tae slow down. I will become ill.” He took another bite. “How dost ye keep it cold when the weather is so fair?”
Cooper narrowed his eyes even more.
Jen said, “The freezer, in the kitchen, makes ice too. It’s glorious in the height of summer.”
“Tis glorious!” Then he added, “But, tae return tae our challenge, Master Cooper, daena tell me if something terrible happens tae Mary Stuart, our queen. I canna bear the idea of her coming tae a poor end.” He swept the spoon out in the air, dismissing the thought. “She is too bonny tae hae a poor end. I am certain she will lead Alba tae peace and prosperity now that we hae the royal intermarriage. Likely we will hae a union of crowns, twill be verra good.”
Cooper chewed his lip.
Jen asked, “So, Torin, when did you leave, what month was it?”
“A’ Chèitean.”
“Say what?”
“Ye ken, Maius mensis?”
Cooper tapped his pen irritatedly. “Are you saying ‘May’?”
Torin nodded.
Jen pointed at the laptop. “See, Coop, you thought you caught him in a lie, but he has a good explanation. The Marys are not the same Marys, and the other one died after he left. Proves it?”
“None of this proves anything, at all — he studied up. He’s a good actor. He’s a talented liar.”
Torin said, “Och, now we hae reached the moment in the challenge where ye are callin’ me a liar. Tae lie is a sin?—”
“On that, you and I agree?—”
Torin tossed his napkin onto the table. “Ye ought tae prove I am wrong, on anything at all, afore ye accuse me of lying — or shall I go?”
I held up my hands. “No, please, that’s not necessary. I know it’s getting tense, it doesn’t need to, everyone just chill, right Cooper? Be polite and let’s enjoy the rest of our dessert, finish our drinks. We can keep going down the list, no one needs to be mad.”
Cooper said, “I can be cool.”
Torin said, “Aye, Mistress Lexi, the challenge over the feast ought nae turn intae a battle in the Great Hall, that is an important rule.”
Cooper drew the list closer and typed on the laptop. “It’s harder to find a good list of tavern food in the sixteenth… hmmmm, you said, Muthill?”
“Aye.” Then Torin asked, “May I hae more, Mistress Lexi?”
I scooped more ice cream into his bowl.
