He wet his already damp lips, a tantalizing flash of pink tongue that had Lawson leaking some more. “You’re big,” he said, voice gone hoarse though he hadn’t even done anything yet.
Lawson was panting, chest sucking in hard on each inhale. “Yeah?”
“Yeah.” Tommy wet his lips again, and his gaze slid back to Lawson’s cock, and Lawson’s fear and anxiety melted away in the face of Tommy’s undisguised, impossible-to-misreadwant.
Tommy leaned in, pressed his nose and lips to the base, and inhaled deeply. Lawson let out another whimper, buried his hands in Tommy’s slick hair, and kept them there, large hands cupped carefully around the back of his skull as Tommy lifted, and parted his lips, and took him inside the wet heat of his mouth.
There was no finesse to it. Tommy had no idea what he was doing, but neither did Lawson, and the velvet of his tongue, and even the accidental scrape of his teeth were perfection. Tommy tried to go all the way down, choked a little, but brushed off Lawson’s worried murmurs and tried again, shallower this time. It was sloppy, spit sliding down the crease of Lawson’s hip and thigh, and the sounds, the slippery suckling noises, the pop of parting lips, the audible gulps when Tommy swallowed, landed hard as punches at the very bottom of his stomach, where pleasure and pressure wound tighter and tighter.
Inexperienced though he was, he knew when he was getting close. The involuntary shudder moving down his thighs, the twitching of his toes, the way he couldn’t take a deep breath, and everything in him was hurtling, hurtling toward the finish. But it was so muchmorethan normal, the sensations all so much more intense than when he was alone with memory, imagination, and his right hand. That was Tommy’s mouth on him, Tommy’s tongue licking up the underside of him, Tommy’s hand scratching at the hair at the base, and Tommy was, Tommy–
I love him so much, he thought, fiercely wondrous. Not just his mouth, or this act, or that it was Tommy who’d wanted to do it, but him. Every inch of him. The feeling made acute to the point of pain by this new, unimagined pleasure.
Orgasm hit him like a freight train. He let out a wordless cry, and tried to tug at Tommy’s hair in warning, but it was too late.
If his brain hadn’t liquified and melted out of his ears, he might have laughed at the noise Tommy made.Herk. But as it was, his spine bowed off the bed, and his hands clenched helplessly in Tommy’s hair, and he was too busy making his own wounded noises, wondering if he’d come or died, and not mad either way.
When he could – when he’d stopped flying apart like atoms in a nuclear reactor – he sucked in a deep breath and opened his eyes. Tommy was sitting up again, face flushed, lips shiny like they were sugar glazed, chest heaving as he breathed. He dashed the back of one hand across his mouth. The other was still curled loosely around the base of Lawson’s spent cock.
It was the most beautiful sight in all of Lawson’s sixteen years, and his love swelled so big and so sure that it pushed out every other emotion. Doubt, fear, hesitance. He opened his arms, and said, “Come here.”
When Tommy got close enough, he reeled him in, and kissed the taste of himself out of his mouth, and shoved a hand down the front of his jeans, until Tommy was gasping brokenly and coming all over his fist.
Tommy made a sound that reached straight into Lawson’s chest and raked claws over his heart. Like he’d been struck, but had liked it; like he was hurt, but in a pleading way. Lawson immediately filed it away for use in future fantasies…and then immediately started crying.
Tommy didn’t notice at first, a boneless puddle on top of him, trying to catch his breath, and so Lawson hoped he could get it under control before he did.
But when he swiped under his glasses with his clean hand, more tears took their place. He shoved his glasses up into his hair and ground the heel of his hand into first one eye, and then the other, but to no avail. The tears poured down his temples, and ran into his hair, and then his next breath shuddered, and his chest hitched, and he clamped his lips together tight against the sound that threatened.
Tommy stilled, and then pushed up onto his hands, his face hovering above Lawson’s.
Shit. Lawson closed his eyes, and tried to hold his breath, and willed the tears away. Why the hell was he crying about a blowjob? What kind of stupid, baby bullshit was that? Tommy was going to be disgusted, Tommy was–
“Hey.” Tommy’s voice was very close, was warm and gentle against his lips, as was the hand that swiped at the tears coursing down his temples.
Lawson cracked his eyes open. Between the tears, and the lack of his glasses, Tommy wasn’t much more than a sunlit blur above him. His eyes were clear, though, right above him, ochre and gold in the dayglow, breathtaking in a way that stalled out Lawson’s hiccupping little sobs, so that he lay still, and breathless, transfixed.
“Are you okay?”
Lawson started to answer, and his eyes filled again.
Worried, Tommy said, “Did I hurt you?”
The idea was so ludicrous he wanted to laugh. He couldn’t, but the urge was there. He was the one who’d all but strangled Tommy with his dick. And Tommy was worried about having hurt him. Unbelievable.
“No,” he choked out. “No, it was good…you were good…I’m…”
Tommy smiled, sweetly, no smirk, no challenge, no fire this time. He sniffed, and Lawson wondered if maybe he felt like crying, too.
“It’s okay,” Tommy murmured, and then lay down on top of him, blanketing him, and pressed their cheeks together, wet to dry, warm to soft.
Lawson clutched him tight, and the shadows lay long and deep across the bed before he finally let go.
~*~
He didn’t realize he’d gotten lost in his own head until Dana poked him in the ribs. He curled away from the movement, laughing before he could help it, still so impossibly ticklish in certain places, all of which Dana knew.
Tommy knew them, too. When he’d finally pushed up and peeled himself off of Lawson, his fingers had slipped over Lawson’s sweat-damp ribs, and he’d burst into giggles. Tommy had seemed delighted; had tickled him on purpose, until the front door closed soundly, and Mom called up the stairs to ask what all the noise was about.
