Emmalyn opened and closed her mouth several times. “I don’t know,” she admitted.
“What do you know?” he asked intensely.
Emmalyn began wandering around the living room, looking anywhere but at him as she struggled to answer him. “I know that I’m glad I’m home. I know that I’m more settled than I was before, ever. I know that I’ve decided to build my house across the street from Havoc and Analise, so I can stay close to her.” She turned to face him. “I know that I don’t want to hurt you ever again. You matter to me. You’re so important to me. I feel horrible that you were hurt by my actions.”
“What did you think I’d feel?”
“I guess I just thought you’d been dealing with me all my life, you’d understand.”
“Things are different than when we were kids, Emmalyn.”
She nodded.
“Somewhere along the way, things changed. I took one look at you and I knew I’d crawl through broken glass joyfully if you were waiting on the other side for me. You, and our life here, are all I want. It’s all I’ve wanted for a long time. But all you did was belittle my dream. Make me feel that I wasn’t enough because I was happy to stay home surrounded by family and build my life here, where all my siblings and cousins could eventually come home and have a strong foundation to add to. I had to let go for a while. I had to protect myself from you. Just the thought of you hurt too much.”
Emmalyn nodded, and when he looked closely at her, he was surprised to see the glistening of unshed tears in her eyes.
“I’m not trying to upset you. I’m trying to clear the air between us. I’m trying to let you see that I’m done with the games. I know you’re strong, you don’t have to prove it to me.You’ve always been strong. That’s one of the many things I love about you. But I do have one question for you.”
She looked at him, almost afraid for him to voice his question.
“Are you brave enough to pack your things, just what you’ll need for a few days, and come back to my home with me? Are you brave enough to stop playing your games? Because I am. I stopped. I’m here, right now, standing in front of you, telling you, I want you in my life. Will you give us a chance?”
“There’s… there’s so much going on right now. It’s not a good time. You just don’t even understand.”
“I do understand, more than you know.”
“I’m trying to keep to myself for the most part…”
He looked at her, knowing exactly what she was thinking. She didn’t want to attract attention to whatever or whoever she was running from to anyone else unnecessarily.
“Emmalyn, I’m strong. I can protect both me and you, and be there for Brandt and whatever he needs from me, too. You know that. Whatever you think makes this a bad time, is just enough to piss me off, then I get stronger. Come home with me.”
Emmalyn weighed Barron’s words. He was right. He was strong. And with her, they’d both be stronger, and if she was actually being watched, like she was 99.9% sure she was, it would shift attention from her parents’ home to her and Barron. And between them, they were equipped to deal with it.
“Trust me, Emmalyn. At the end of it all, whenever that is, if you don’t want me I’ll let you go and I won’t even try to make you stay.”
“It’s not my job, I don’t want that anymore. I already told you I’m liking being home. I want to build my house here.”
“I already built mine. I didn’t take you or what you wanted into account, because you were gone and made it clear I was not in your plans. But it’s yours, too. But if you don’t feel like it’shome and want to build another — for us. For a family, I have no problem leaving mine for whatever you envision, and making a life in yours. Mine can go to whoever else might want it.”
“Oh, God, I’m so overwhelmed,” she said, pressing her hands to either side of her face as she began to shake her head back and forth. “I don’t know, I don’t know, I don’t know.”
Suddenly he was right in front of her, his hands covering hers where they pressed against the sides of her face. “I know. I know you’re afraid. I know you’re worried. I know you’re overwhelmed, and I know you’re considering every single side of every possible scenario flying through your head right now. But I also know you want me as much as I want you. And I know you’re as drawn to me as I am to you.”
She nodded tearfully.
“So, let’s back this up a bit. No promises. No vows. Just you and me, and some time together. Get your things. Come with me. Let’s not get ahead of ourselves and make promises or anything that make either of us feel pressured. Let’s just see what happens. See if we can manage to enjoy each other like we used to. See if we can be friends again. I got your back, I always will, and I believe that you have mine when it comes right down to it. Let’s start from there.”
A slight crease appeared between her brows.
He huffed a laugh. “That crease that lets me know you’re a little perturbed is back.”
“I feel boxed in,” she confessed.
“I feel like I’m standing on a bridge that’s about to be yanked out from under me.”
“I’m sorry.”
