I wince and search for the right words. “All right, so it’s partially what you think. But there’s more to it.”
“More lies?” he sneers.
Exasperated, I throw my hands up. “Would you shut up and listen? Yes, I’m technically spying for Hawke, but it’s not by choice.”
Cenric’s scowl deepens.
Great job, Everly.
Antagonizing the angry, muscular man who could snap you like a twig.
Brilliant strategy.
Cenric’s eyebrow arches skeptically. “Not by choice? Did he hold a knife to your throat?”
“No, worse.” My chest tightens as I force the words. “He threatened my family.”
For a moment, something flickers in Cenric’s eyes—doubt, maybe even concern—but it’s quickly replaced by that icy fury again. “Am I supposed to believe that?”
Frustrated, I throw up my hands and sigh. “Believe it or don’t, but it’s the truth. What was I supposed to do? Let himhurt my family? Let him kill that poor woman he is holding captive?”
Cenric’s jaw clenches. “So noble of you, sacrificing the safety of an entire camp for a stranger.”
“Don’t you dare take the moral high ground with me,” I snap back, my anger finally bubbling to the surface. “You have no idea what it’s like to be powerless, to have everything you love held over your head like a guillotine.”
Part of me wants to slap him. Another part wants to kiss him senseless. My brain unhelpfully suggests doing both at the same time.
Cenric’s anger deflates slightly, but the tension in his jaw tells me he’s far from convinced. I want to reach out and touch him, but I’m pretty sure that would only end with me losing a hand.
“I know how this looks. But everything between us—” I gesture to him, then me, hoping he understands I mean our kisses, our conversations, the way my heart does backflips whenever he’s near “—that was real.Isreal.”
He scoffs again, and I resist the impulse to stomp my foot.
“If I were really some master spy…” Exasperation creeps into my tone as I continue, “…don’t you think I’d have come up with a better cover story than a clumsy woman who falls in mud puddles?”
His lips twitch, almost like he wants to smile, then his expression hardens again. “Maybe that’s exactly what a clever spy would do.”
I roll my eyes. “Yes, because nothing says brilliant spy like public humiliation.”
Cenric runs a hand through his hair, messing it up in a way that makes him look unfairly attractive for someone accusing me of treachery. “Even if what you’re saying is true—”
“—it is,” I interject.
“Even if it’s true,” he continues, as if I didn’t speak, “how am I supposed to trust you now? How do I know you’re not still feeding information to Hawke?”
The pain in his voice cuts through me like a knife. I want nothing more than to throw my arms around him, to promise him that he can trust me, that I’d never betray him, but I know that’s not enough. Not anymore.
“You don’t,” I admit softly. “I guess you’ll have to decide if you believe me or not.”
Cenric’s eyes search mine, and for a moment, I let myself hope. Then, he shakes his head, and my heart shatters into a million pieces.
“I can’t. I’m sorry, Everly, but I can’t take that risk.”
As he turns to leave, I have a wild urge to tackle him to the ground and refuse to let him go until he believes me. But considering he’s about twice my size and trained in combat, I’d probably end up embarrassing myself. Again.
Instead, I watch him walk away, taking my heart with him.
Chapter
