Asha would never understand or allow me to marry Jasce. Nor can I explain that no other man could inhabit my thoughts when he’s already claimed every corner of them.
“If you marry, it might help you stop thinking abouthim.” She says ‘him’ with a bitter edge, as if the very idea of Jasce is poison against her tongue, a venom she can’t seem to expel no matter how hard she tries.
She doesn’t understand. How could she? But I know arguing will only strengthen her resolve. So, I offer her the response she seeks, even as my heart silently refutes it. “I’ll think about it.”
“I want you to do more than think about it. You are the second eldest. It is your duty to help strengthen our house. Isn’t that what you want?”
I swallow hard, the lump in my throat nearly choking me. The only thing I want is Jasce, but I know confessing that truth will only deepen Asha’s frown lines.
“Rora,” Asha says, her voice heavy with impatience. “Don’t you want what is best for our people? For our house?”
“Yes, of course I do.” I drop my eyes, unable to meet her scrutinizing stare.
“Then you will marry a man that will help strengthen us,” she says, her words like a prison door clanging shut on my future, my dreams, my heart.
She stands after a moment and brushes the wrinkles from her nightdress with brisk, efficient movements. “I will introduce you to him soon. He is a good match, Annora. You will see that in time.” She pauses, her expression softening slightly as she takes in my hunched shoulders and downcast eyes. “As for now, try to rest.”
She squeezes my shoulder before she turns and strides from my bedchamber. As soon as the door closes with a soft thud, I allow my gaze to drift to the window. I imagine Jasce standing there and glaring at the thought of me marrying another man.
I rise from my bed, then move toward the window. How can I possibly entertain thoughts of another man when Jasce’s presence lingers so strongly in my heart? It feels like a betrayal of the connection we share.
With a heavy sigh, I sink to the window seat. Asha would have me marry for duty, to secure alliances and strengthen our house’s position. Yet, my heart yearns for something more profound, something that goes beyond political maneuvering and strategic unions.
I want love, pure and unconditional. I want a partnership built on mutual respect, understanding, and unwavering devotion. The thought of settling for anything less leaves a bitter taste in my mouth and a hollow ache in my chest.
As I settle in bed a short while later, I lie awake, thinking about everything Asha said, but mostly I think about Jasce and his promise to come back for me.
ChapterFive
JASCE
The stenchof hay and horse greets me as I slip into the shadow-drenched stables. Jude leans against a wooden post, an apple in hand, crunching away, like he hasn’t a care in the world.
Loose black strands fall over his forehead as he cocks his head to the side, a smirk playing on his lips when I come to a stop near him. “Well? Did you see her?”
“I might have caught a glimpse,” I admit, feigning indifference as I stride past him and pretend to inspect the bridles hanging on the wall.
“A glimpse?” Jude laughs. “Jasce, brother, you’re more transparent than you think.”
His words strike deeper than I want to admit. To be smitten is to be vulnerable, and vulnerability is not a luxury I can afford as chieftain. And yet, here I am in Bakva when I should be in Sharhavva—the capital city of House of Crimson.
I cannot help it. Not when I need Annora with me, and I’ll be damned if I allow anything to stop me from bringing her to Sharhavva.
I’m chieftain now, and if I want a wife from House of Silver, then I shall have a wife from House of Silver.
Jude takes another bite of apple as he studies me for several moments before speaking again. “Will she leave with you?”
“Yes,” I say, knowing I will not leave Bakva until Annora is next to me.
Things were different with Lyra. I enjoyed being away from her, but with Annora, I feel an overwhelming need to have her nearby.
“Did Annora agree to go with you?” Jude doesn’t bother concealing the skepticism from his voice.
I shake my head. “Not yet, but she will.”
A hint of a smirk pulls at the corner of Jude’s mouth as he raises an eyebrow at me. “What if she doesn’t like you, brother?”
The way Annora melted into my arms overwhelms my thoughts. “Oh, she likes me,” I say, a note of smug confidence in my tone. “Trust me on that.”
