I pull my knees forward, rest my hands against them, and allow my bitterness to resonate in my words. “You have already shown me enough to know you’re just like your father.”
Anger flares across Hector’s features, hardening his eyes in a way I have never seen before. “I amnotmy father. If I were, you would already be dead.”
“I would rather be dead.”
Dark strands of hair fall over Hector’s forehead as he shakes his head. “You have dug this hole, Sol. I suggest you get used to it.”
Without another word, Hector grabs the only torch and steps from the room. The lock clicking into place echoes like a crack of thunder.
I blink at the eerie darkness and raise a fist to my mouth. It’s too stifling, as if at any moment the shadows will reach out and suffocate me. They probably will.
The mattress dips as I shift to lie on my side. This is worse than the cottage. So much worse.
I rotate from side-to-side, but it’s impossible to get comfortable. I let out a long sigh and flop to my back as the two Bloodstone barbarians I murdered blind my vision. They didn’t deserve what I did to them.
It doesn’t matter that I’m angry with Hector and Luc. Guilt still festers inside me for taking the lives of those men. They probably had families.
I blow out a quick breath as a different day invades my mind, a day I swore I wouldn’t think about. Hector’s shock when I struck him with the knife still bleeds into my vision. His horror when he realized what I had done still weaves threads of guilt around my heart. The healing verses I uttered still echo in my ears.
The spell weakened me. Afterward, I fell asleep, and I didn’t wake for three days.
It happened at the apothecary in Kyanite land. When the healers had to use powerful spells, they sometimes needed to renew themselves at the pool of Zalhandara. Hopefully, I don’t require renewal. That pool is a long way from here.
Nothing really mattered after I healed Hector. I was too numb to speak. Too numb to feel. Too numb to even think about what had happened.
Now, I’m too angry with Hector to apologize.
I would rather sleep on this lumpy mattress for the rest of my life. I bury my face against it and scream. Over and over again, I scream until I have nothing left. No hopes. No dreams. No plans. No way to conquer the man I’m bound to.
As I fall asleep, those horrid truths hiss in my ears.
The sky transforms to an ominous shade of gray, and the earth trembles. The trees make a dreary song as I grip the handle of the throwing knife so tight it burns my skin.
I scream into the wind, needing to not let go, needing to change Fate.
Fate doesn’t care. It has never cared.
The weapon still flies from my hand, striking Gabriel in the chest.
I wake with a jerk and sit upright in bed. Trembles overtake me, violently rocking my body.
I hug my arms around myself, but they keep coming and bringing me back to the day I cannot forget.
How I wish I could.
Gabriel.
ChapterFive
“Sol.”
I push away the hand shaking my shoulder.
It only returns, shaking me harder than before.
“Wake up!”
I mumble incoherently and try to roll away from Hector. After a pitiful night of very little sleep, I just want to be left alone. Maybe then I could actually rest.
