The smile disappears from his eyes, his mouth. “Earlier, I was performing, as you do every time you try to tempt me.”
“I am not performing. I simply have no wish to deny myself.”
Four summers is far too long to wait. Four summers of longing, wanting, thinking of the next touch. The next kiss.
The man in mind never had a face. He was just a hope that somehow, someway I would find time to renew my passion.
Of course, I only allowed such thoughts when I was alone in my bedchamber and the world had darkened around me.
Now, the man who could awaken those desires doesn’t want me.
“Good night.”
How final those two words are. How unfriendly. Though, Gabriel has never tried to be friendly.
He’ll not deter me. At every push, I’ll shove back. At every unkind word he speaks, I’ll answer in kindness.
Though, I’ll have to stop trying to sound like those women. They knew the art of seducing men.
I obviously do not.
ChapterNineteen
Dread weighs heavy against my limbs as Gabriel encourages me from the cottage the following morning. People walk toward the center of the city, where a massive crowd gathers before a big open square.
Five men dressed in blue surcoats with a gold tree emblem stand in the center with their hands tied behind their backs. I don’t know the Kyanites, yet it doesn’t stop my skin from burning or my throat from clenching.
Everything in me wants to ask. Who sent you? What is your purpose? The words stay as frozen as the man standing beside me. I steal a sideway glance, noticing Gabriel’s firm jaw, his tight lips, his eyes locked on the men who tried infiltrating Astarobane.
I spot Malachi among the Bloodstone people. A young blonde woman stands beside him, her hand intertwined in his. I look away and try to ignore the tightening in my belly.
He wasmyfirst kiss.
Not hers!
I mentally shake my head. She can have Malachi. He’s not part of my path anymore.
Ten men dressed in black Bloodstone surcoats and holding bows face the condemned men. My throat clenches even more as Alden walks through the crowd and stops in front of the square. He raises his hand, and an eerie silence falls over the people.
“Last night these five Kyanites stole into our city and tried to infiltrate our homes,” he says, his words like a dagger to my heart. “We will never tolerate such violence against our people. May Olah forgive them. For we do not.”
At his command, the archers raise their bows and release their arrows. Each one strikes at the hearts of the men condemned to die. As they slump to the ground, my soul slumps with them.
Sunlight staggers over the square as the crowd turns away—back to their cottages, their duties, their lives.
I follow Gabriel. My lips too numb to speak. My limbs too shaky to run. My throat too painful to swallow. Even though I knew coming here wouldn’t be easy, I was never prepared to watch Kyanites be executed.
Every part of me braces for Gabriel’s scorn, his mockery. He offers nothing as we draw to a stop outside our cottage. I brush my fingers against my surcoat, to where my kyanite necklace hides behind the fabric. It provides no warmth. No solace. It’s as useless as the dust swirling in the distance.
Several moments pass before he speaks. “I’ll see you this evening.”
I swallow through the ash in my throat and lift my gaze to his. “Where are you going?”
“To train.” He points his chin toward the front door. “Meanwhile, you can settle.”
“Settle?” The urge to scoff overwhelms me. I stifle it and instead speak in a plain voice. “I have nothing to settle.”
“You can arrange things how you wish.”
