He appeared startled by her words but he didn’t turn and run away. Instead, his lips began to curve. “Are you saying what I think you’re saying?”
“No! Of course not. That is, if you think I’m saying what I think you think I’m saying.” She was so confused, she added, “I think.”
He shook his head. “Well, that’s disappointing.”
“What’s disappointing?”
He took a step back and his gaze dropped to the ground. “I thought, for a second, you were saying you wanted to marry me.”
Oh that tricky devil. If she said no, she didn’t want to marry him, it was possible he might think she actually didn’t want to marry him. When of course there was nothing she wanted more. But she also didn’t want to be the one doing the proposing.
For a second there was absolute silence between them. Finally, she said, “I am not putting myself in the position where years from now our grandchildren ask how we ended up married and you get to say that I proposed to you.”
He kept his head down but she heard a sound suspiciously like a snort of laughter. “Think about what this is like for me. I’m the one facing rejection here. I mean, you’ve already rejected me once. I’m not sure I can take it again.”
Her eyes narrowed on him. He couldn’t see this because he was still looking at the ground but she felt that he was teasing her. But what if he wasn’t? No, for once in her life, she was going be strong and ask for what she wanted. She drew herself up to her full height. She sucked in a deep breath. Then he glanced up, and she could see not only the laughter and fun in his eyes but also the piercing light of joy. “Did you say grandchildren?”
She closed her eyes and scrunched up her face as though in pain. “I did. I said grandchildren. This is the effect you have on women. We’re not together anymore, we’re broken up, and I’m talking to you about grandchildren.”
“How many grandchildren are we talking?”
She pulled together the frayed edges of her dignity. “I don’t know. I guess that depends on how many children we have.”
“Have you been talking to my mother?”
She giggled helplessly. “I adore your mother. She’s possibly the only woman I know who makes my mother seem non-interfering.”
“It’s almost worth getting married just so they have to be in-laws.”
She shook her head. “This is not how it goes. We can’t talk about in-laws when we aren’t even engaged.”
“You’re right. Someone really needs to finish this proposal. And do it right.”
“Well I’m not doing it. I made enough of a fool of myself.”
He took her hand and pulled her closer. She raised her head, her heart beating fiercely. She thought he would kiss her but instead he gazed down at her seriously. “I can’t promise you that everything will be easy. But I can promise you that I’ve never loved another woman as I love you and I never will. Before you give me your heart, I ask you to give me your trust.”
She dragged in a quick breath. “Can’t you ask for something easy? Like all my money or my recipe for pregnant lady tea? Which, by the way, is a closely guarded secret.”
He shook his head. Completely serious. “Trust. That’s all I want from you.”
“You’re asking a lot. How am I supposed to just stand there and trust when I see the way women look at you?”
“That’s not your business. How do I look at them? As compared to how I look at you? I think you’ll find there’s a difference.”
“But some of those women are so beautiful and sophisticated and smart. Why would you prefer me?”
He put a hand up and gently pushed one of her curls over her shoulder and wrapped his free hand around the cascade falling down her back. “I don’t know why. But I do. I will. Forever.”
And she understood that this was her moment. It wouldn’t always be easy, but if she couldn’t trust him they didn’t have anything so she nodded slowly. “I promise to trust you with all my ability and if I’m ever unsure about anything to ask you.”
“And I will do the same.”
She gave a snort of disbelief. “Men don’t fall at my feet and salivate when they look at me the way women do to you.”
“Yes they do. You just don’t see it. Anyway, I promise you the same. I give you my trust and if I’m ever unsure about anything, I will ask.”
She nodded. “Deal.”
