He stood there looking guilty, and then said, “I should’ve called first. Maybe I shouldn’t have come at all. I didn’t plan to, but I was driving by and I saw your light on. Can I talk to you about something?”
In the year or so that she had known him, Geoff had become almost as close as one of her brothers. She loved him for himself, as well as for the fact that he made Iris so happy. Now that she was sure her sister was okay she smiled at him and opened the door wider.
“Of course. Come on in. Do you want some coffee or something?”
“No. It’s okay. I won’t stay long. I just … I’m feeling a little troubled and, like I said, I saw your light.”
“Then it was a sign you were meant to come here. Sit down and tell me what’s on your mind.”
He sat on the couch, in the very same spot where Iris had sat last night. Almost as though he felt her presence there. Marguerite knew she was being fanciful but she liked the notion that two people could be so in harmony. Except it seemed they weren’t quite so in harmony as she’d believed. Geoff certainly looked as though he was worried and didn’t quite know how to begin.
She let him find his way into the conversation, knowing that the best thing she could do for him was simply to listen carefully. She sat across from him in the same place she had sat with Iris last night.
He was dressed for school in black jeans with a check shirt and a skinny tie. He had a tweed jacket thrown over the ensemble. He looked like a sexy, rumpled teacher and she bet a lot of the girls in his class were half in love with him. His face was what she would’ve called pleasant, comfortable, without being super handsome until he looked at her with those blue eyes and then she could definitely see his appeal. But right now his blue eyes didn’t twinkle. He rubbed his face as though he were tired.
Finally he spoke. “Maybe this is out of line, and if it is, I’m sorry. Maybe it’s even a betrayal of Iris to talk to you about this, but I know you’re her best friend and I’m wondering if you can answer one very simple question for me.”
“I’ll try.” She didn’t bother telling him that her first loyalty was to Iris, because he already knew that. There was a beat of silence and then, as though the words were pushed out of him he asked, “Why won’t she marry me?”
“Why won’t she marry you?” she repeated. Okay, this was a surprise. “Aren’t you still engaged?”
He leaned forward and threw up his hands. “Of course we are. But she keeps postponing the date. The day we found out about the baby, we were so happy. Life seemed absolutely perfect. I said something like, ‘We should get married before you start showing,’ something like that. And she got this panicky look on her face. Like this was a completely new concept she hadn’t contemplated before. Then she said it was too much stress with the baby coming.”
He suddenly rose to his feet as though he couldn’t remain sitting any longer. “Do you mind if I get some water?”
She was tempted to jump to her feet and get it for him but she realized he needed to move, he needed something to do, so she simply said, “Can you bring me one, too?”
In the minute or two that it took him to fetch two glasses of water she had a little time to think. So had he. The first thing he said was, “Maybe I’m not the greatest catch in Oregon, or even Hidden Falls come to that, but we’re having a child. We’re engaged. Why the hell won’t she marry me? Do you think she’s having second thoughts about me?”
She could hear the hurt in his voice and was aware of an instinct to soothe, to make things right. Iris had always been the one in the family that everyone went to with their problems. She was the oldest girl and the kind of person who listened as though she really cared, because she did really care about people. Counseling didn’t come so naturally to Marguerite, but there was nothing she wouldn’t do for the people she loved. She loved Iris and she’d come to love Geoff.
She sipped her water and then said slowly, “I don’t understand it, either. I thought maybe you were both too busy to plan a wedding.”
He snorted. “I’d go to the town hall and get married on my lunch hour. I don’t care about the party, I want Iris as my wife. But when I pressed her, she babbled something about only being able to handle so many huge life changes at once.”
“Iris said that? It doesn’t sound like her.” Iris was a planner, and a doer.
“I didn’t think so, either.”
“Have you tried to talk to her again?”
“Of course I have. Why do you think I’m here? She tells me she can’t think about it right now, or changes the subject.” He glanced up at Marguerite and she could see the pain in his face. “I love that woman. I love her so much, I can’t imagine how I could go on without her. And we’re going to have a baby. I may be old-fashioned, but I think if you love each other and you’re about to have a baby, then why the hell wouldn’t you get married?”
She answered his unspoken question, because she could hear it clanging loudly around her living room. “I can tell you one thing, Geoff,” she said with certainty. “If she’s putting off the wedding, it is not because she doesn’t love you.” She smiled a little. “As you say, we are very close. I have never seen Iris so crazy in love with anyone as she is with you.”
“Then why? Why won’t she even talk about it? Maybe she wants the next few months to be all about her and the baby, I can understand that. I’ll wait. But I need to know.” He sat for a moment and repeated, “I need to know.”
She sat quietly for a moment, thinking about Iris and letting her intuition consider snatches of conversation, the way Iris was pushing the people she loved most to a distance. Scraps of conversation. Geoff sipped his water and waited as though she were an Oracle and could give him the answers to life’s problems.
She thought she understood at least partly what Iris was going through. “My sister has always been fiercely independent. She’s the oldest girl and used to taking charge. When you first met her last year she’d given up on finding love and marriage and babies in the traditional way. She was shopping for a sperm donor and hoping she hadn’t left it too late. And then you came along and offered her love and marriage and babies in the traditional way. Maybe sometimes, when we get our dreams offered to us, we’re too frightened to believe in them. Maybe because, if they don’t come true it would break us. So it’s easier not to believe.”
He was watching her face intently, and nodded slowly. “I know she’s scared. It’s why she won’t tell your mom or anybody until she feels like the risk of miscarriage is really low.”
“Maybe, in some strange way, she feels like getting married will jinx the pregnancy or something. I’m making this up as I go along, but it sort of makes sense to me.”
“But that’s crazy. I’m here for her. I love her! I don’t want her to shut me out.”
“Maybe you need to tell her that. Don’t push the marriage thing. But let her know that you’re feeling left out. Iris is always the person people go to with their problems. Present this to her as a problem you’re having. I bet she’s not seeing how this is affecting you.”
He didn’t look thrilled with the idea. “You want me to act like one of those whiners who are always wasting her time and getting free therapy?”
“Maybe it’s a terrible idea, but it’s all I’ve got. Really, Iris is the one who’s so good at solving people’s problems.”
He rose and headed for the door. “You’re not so bad.” She followed him. “Don’t screw it up this time. I want you for my brother.”
He laughed. “I better not. Because I definitely want you for my sister.”
