She stopped at the drugstore on her way home and stocked up on cold remedies and tissue. On impulse, she bought herself a bunch of tulips from the flower vendor next door. If Luke were home, he’d bring herflowers.
When she let herself into the apartment, she went straight to her bedroom and changed into her warmest, snuggliest sweats, slipped into her fuzzy slippers and wrapped herself in Luke’s terry-cloth robe. It had somehow ended up at her place and it was bigger than hers, so would be warmer, she told herself, bundling into it and letting it hug her. She wished she hadn’t lost her sense of smell; she wanted to catch a whiff of Luke’s scent from thegarment.
She schlepped back out to the living area, glanced at the essays that needed marking, sniffed, felt her forehead and decided she was probably too feverish to work. She then looked at the television and figured she really neededrest.
Grabbing a pillow off her bed and the purple chenille throw from the back of her couch, she snuggled up and flipped on theTV.
A rerun of “Friends.”Flip.Some kind of home blender on the home shopping channel. Hmm. Earrings coming up later, maybe she’d check back.Flip.
Cooking show. They were making a cream soup with lots of garlic. She wished somebody would offer her a bowl of homemade soup. If Luke were here he’d make her soup. What was the point of having a boyfriend who lived in the same apartment block and worked from home if he was going to go out of town the one day she came home sick and needed him?Flip.
“Ginger.” Ah, Shari wasn’t much into talk shows. Maybe she’d go back to see what Ross and Rachel were doing. She’d pop some meds, drink some herbal tea and go tobed.
She was about to flip back to “Friends,” when Ginger said, with a knowing glance to the camera, “Is your man a total moron in bed? Don’t give up hope. Maybe he can be trained to become a to-die-for lover. Our next guest is Lance Flagstaff, author ofSex for Total Morons: A How-ToGuide.”
Huh. Shari forgot the meds and got comfortable. This, she had to see. Who was this man who’d brought her and Luke together? His book might have been the thing that got Luke on the path to self-improvement, but she liked to think she’d had a lot to do with teaching him how to please awoman.
Smiling smugly, and wishing Luke were in town so they could watch this together, she grabbed the remote so she could set the DVR and pushed the record button. It was a special book for them, she’d record this for Luke. With eager curiosity, she got comfortable on the couch and waited through the commercial break until Ginger’s guestappeared.
He walked onto the stage, smiling broadly, giving a diffident wave to the bunch of hooting and clapping women, who seemed to make up the bulk of theaudience.
He shook hands with Ginger as though they were old friends, then sat at ease in one of her pinkarmchairs.
“So, Lance,” Ginger said with a let’s-us-girls-have-some-fun glance at the audience, “you must be quite an expert in bed to teach other people how to be goodlovers.”
The camera zoomed in for a close-up shot of Lance’sface.
A horrible gurgling sound came out of Shari’smouth.
Luke—her Luke—was on television. Promoting the book that he hadwritten.
Sex for Total Morons: A How-To Guide.Ginger was holding it up for the world to see, that lurid red-and-blackcover.
Oh, it had worked, all right. She wondered how many other naive women he’d conned with that teach-me-to-love-youcrap.
Hot color scalded her face as she thought about the way she’d guided him in the ways of pleasing her, guided him right into her body. And worst of all, into herheart.
She ought to slap the TV off, but she couldn’t tear herself away. With horrified fascination, she watched this man she’d thought she’d known and discovered she didn’t know atall.
Women in the audience were asking him questions, eager for their turn to ask him—Luke, Lance, whatever his name was—foradvice.
Oh, he was charming, he was smooth, she’d give him that. She only wished Ginger had a phone-in line, because Shari had a question or two she’d like to ask Mr. LanceFlagstaff.
She was sniffing faster than her box of tissue could keep up and realized it wasn’t just the cold; she was crying. Sobbing, damnit.
He’d betrayed her in the most basic way possible. Stolen her trust, posed as something he wasn’t. He’d lied. Every time they’d climbed into bed and he’d hesitated, or had asked her what she liked, he’d been lying. He probably laughed himself silly every day at herexpense.
“So, I have to tell you. I’m skeptical,” Ginger said. She picked up the book and flapped it once more in front of the camera. “Can a book teach you how to be a goodlover?”
The camera closed in on Luke, and the grin he sent Ginger was both teasing and self-deprecating.
“I wasn’t sure of the answer to that myself when I wrote the book, to be honest with you, Ginger. But I actually conducted an experiment in the last fewweeks.”
“No,” Shari whispered, curling into a fetal ball. “No.”
“I’ve learned a lot since getting together with the woman I’m with now. I learned that every time you make love with someone new you have to learn their particular likes and dislikes, their unique responses. A caress that sends one woman straight to ecstasy may leave the next woman wishing she had her nail file handy to pass the time. Am Iright?”
Here he glanced at the audience and was rewarded with delighted giggles and noddingheads.
