“You should make more time for Bella,” Mom says suddenly.“She’s struggling.”
I was about to take another sip of my iced tea and end up spilling some all over my shirt as I change my mind in the last second.
“Did she tell you that?”
I have a lot of fears surrounding Bella, chief among them that she’ll suddenly just be gone from my life again.It’s irrational and whatever happens I’ll survive it, I know that.But I don’t want to have to.
Mom shakes her head.“No, she won’t talk to me at all.And I’ve been trying to get her to open up.”
“Why?”I ask, making a face and hiding it by using tissues to try and blot out the worst of the spill on my chest.I tend to turn into a big clumsy baby when I’m around my mom.And at my age, that’s just shameful.
“Because she needs to talk.I don’t think she’s ever faced and resolved everything that happened to her.”
“That’s just the psychiatrist in you talking,” I say.“I think she’s doing great.And she told me she had therapy in… a couple of years ago.”
I was going to sayin prison, but my mom doesn’t know about that and I don’t think tonight’s the night to tell her.In fact, I think Bella should do that herself, when she’s ready.Might be not wanting to is the reason she’s not opening up to my mom.
“She seems very sad, troubled even, unsure of herself and her place here,” Mom says.“And yes, that is the psychiatrist in me talking.”
It was shaping up to be a cozy, calm night, but now, not so much.
“Maybe the two of you should go away somewhere.My brother’s house in Sunset Beach is free.You could take the bike, make a ride of it.”
My mom always sounds so weird when talking about anything to do with the MC.Usually I find it funny.Now everything just lays heavy.
Until I spot Bella coming towards us along the garden path.There’s no sun to speak of left in the sky, but her face glows despite it.She truly is the most beautiful person I’ve ever seen.I’ve never yet written a book, but I’m sure I could write a whole series of books just about her beauty.
“There you are,” she says.“The front door was locked, and I’ve been knocking?—”
I scoop her into my arms before she can finish her sentence and love how the initial shock on her face melts away to pure joy as she hugs me back.
“Sorry about that,” I say.“I’m a little paranoid about leaving the doors unlocked.”
“Yeah, you do worry a lot,” she says jokingly.
“Let’s go away, just the two of us and the road,” I say.“Destination Sunset Beach.”
I can just tell my mom is smiling behind my back even though I can’t see her face.Bella smiles too, and it makes her face glow even more.
“When?”
“Right now?”I say and release her.“A starry ride and a long night listening to the waves hitting the shore.You in?”
Once again, surprise melts away to joy in her face.“I definitely am.”
“Let’s go then.”
Why not?A couple of days of bliss, joy and love by the sea.Before I go off to a war that’s not even my war.And before I tell her that brother of hers, the last of her family, is not having the time of his life and might not have much of a life left.But only the war is an actual threat, the rest just rumors Skye’s been able to uncover.
I’ve been trying to find the right time to tell Bella about it.But the right time will be after we get back from the beach.Or better yet, never.
20
Bella
We rode into the night, the starry sky greeting us as we left the city, opening in all it’s sparkling majesty before us.We stuck to the back roads, away from any light that was not starlight.I wish I could recreate the beauty that is the starry night sky on paper and on skin.I’ve tried many times, but it never captures the real beauty of it.But I’ll keep on trying.Until I get it right.
It took us four hours to get to the house on Sunset Beach and yet it felt like a short ride.Too short.We’re sitting on the wooden porch, watching the glistening black ocean move like a lazy snake, holding each other, needing to be close.
