Afterwards, the MC did find the man who took his fiancée’s life, we made sure he went away for a very long time, and that’s not something we can offer all our members, but the sting of Jack’s senseless death never went away.At least for me, the sting of all the injustices we can’t put right never does.
“So, what is it that you guys do?Exactly?”she asks once the server leaves.
“We go after the criminals no one else is willing to hunt down for one reason or another.”
“And then you what, kill them?”She sounds shocked, but not as much as I would expect her to be.
I shake my head.“Not exactly.Usually, we hand them over to the police or the FBI after we gather enough evidence against them.”
“So basically, you’re like private investigators?”she asks.“And I assume Rogue’s family at LAPD feeds you the information you need.”
“Yes, you’re pretty much right.But we’re like very cool private investigators.And we decide which cases we take on.”
That’s all true… of how we’ve done things in the past.Before Devil’s Nightmare MC gave us the location of Ghost and we helped them go full ninja on their enemies.I’d taken one life before we joined forces with them to take down a sex trafficking ring.Now that it’s done, I might actually be closer to a mass murderer classification.It doesn’t sit well with me.Nightmares are a daily occurrence these days.And even though those assholes had it coming, a life is still a life.
She has a very knowing expressions in her eyes as she gazes at me.
“So what’s changed?”she asks.
“We’ve now become killers,” I say, since there’s no sugarcoating it.“I’ve become a killer.And it doesn’t feel good.”
But it feels good to tell someone about this darkness that’s been consuming me.Someone who won’t judge me.Might even understand.“No one at the MC talks about it.Everyone believes we did what we had to do.Did what was right and what needed doing.And mostly I agree.But I can’t pretend it hasn’t also ripped my soul the way a cat scratching a piece of silk rips it.”
Her eyes are very soft and kind of wet as she looks at me.I can’t look at her, can’t see all that pity.She probably thinks I’m an idiot worrying about this.Just like everyone else would if they’d hear me talk about it.With the amount of violent deaths we’ve seen and experienced, who could blame them?The whole reason for our MC’s existence is to punish those who have done wrong.Punish themby any means.Bring them to justiceby any means.I had no trouble with that.In theory, it would seem now.
She takes my hand and squeezes, the touch electrifying and calming at the same time.The way I imagine getting struck by lightning would be—unbearable at first, then soft as the pain subsides.Her touch always was like lightning.
“You worry too much,” she says.“But that just shows the purity of your heart.You have it in you to forgive everyone.Even those who don’t deserve it.”
“Do I?”I ask skeptically, finally daring to look into her eyes.
“It’s why you’re here, offering me a second chance when no one else is willing to give me one.”
Her eyes are the color of soft grass in some sleepy meadow at sunset, when only golden light remains.It’s a place where I can rest and not worry about anything.
“Right?”she asks, sounding much less sure of her words than she did a moment ago.
I lay my hand over hers.“Right.Now let’s not talk about this anymore.I didn’t come here to bring you down.”
“We can talk about anything you want.”
But it’s not gonna be this.Not now.I also won’t ask her how she could leave me like she did, without a single glance back.I don’t want to spoil this moment.I waited ten years for it.I can enjoy the serene meadow in her eyes first, before I tear it all down.I’ve earned it.
It feels good touching her skin.Better than I could ever imagine it would.Unfortunately, we have to let go of each other to make room for the meal arriving.But it’s only a momentary respite.Because after this lunch, I mean to make up for all the touching we’ve missed in the last ten years.And more.
6
Bella
He’s keeping a lot locked away.Bad things that he’s done since we saw each other last.Maybe even hurt over the way we ended things.I saw him lock it up even tighter during lunch, saw it in his eyes and on his face.Understood that he didn’t want to talk about any of it anymore.
He unlocked something else though.Something sweeter.His hand gently brushing a strand of hair off my face so it wouldn’t get dunked in my food.His arm resting lightly across my shoulders as I led us back to my apartment.A genuine, booming laugh as I told him a few of the funnier stories of my last ten years.Like the time I gave a British guy a tattoo of anasswhen he actually wanted adonkey.
“Talk about a glitch in communication,” he says, chuckling again.“What did you do?”
“The guy went berserk, so I spent the whole night fixing the tattoo and turning it into a donkey,” I say.“It turned out to be one of my better tats, if I do say so myself.”
“Well, you’re the best person to know.”
