Me: You’d have driven all the way here just to take me home?
Zach: In a damn heartbeat.
Five
Me: I fell asleep thinking of you.
Zach: Please tell me we’re about to sext.
Me: The moment I woke up, I ran my hand down my chest between my bountiful breasts. I slowly dragged it across my flat stomach, goose bumps rising along my skin at the touch. It wasn’t until I was right at the opening of my white cotton panties that I decided I wasn’t going to touch myself because WE ARE NOT SEXTING, YOU PERVERT.
Zach: I hate you so much right now.
Zach: I HAD A SOLID BONER GOING
Me: Did you really?
Zach: What do you expect? I’m a man, dammit! We like titties and goose bumps and white cotton panties and sex. YOU ARE EVIL.
Zach: Can we still sext later?
Me: NO!
Me: Maybe.
Me: We’ll see.
Zach: Really?!
Me: OMG NO!
Me: ;-)
Zach: I am so confused, yet still slightly turned on.
Me: Please stop telling me about your boner.
Zach: I will never not tell you about my boner. That’s not the kind of friendship I want.
Me: You’re so weird.
Zach: And…
Me: *rolls eyes* And I like it. I LIKE IT, OKAY?!
Zach: I know you do.
Me: UGH!
Me: FYI, I’m not sexting you. Ever.
Zach: But I’m REALLY cute…
Me: Oh puh-lease. Every rando on the other side of the screen will say that shit. You need to prove it.
Zach: Geez, Delia, if you wanted a picture of me, all you had to do was ask.
Me: I don’t want a picture because I’m not sexting you.
