Page 85 of We Are the Stars


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Elliott

Six MonthsLater

I slide into my seat at the back of the large classroom. I have time before class begins, so I flip open my notebook to a blank page and begin doodling aimlessly.

It’s the first day of the second semester and after some huge changes in the last several months, I’m excited to see what this new year holds.

There was a lot of convincing from my mom, but I finally talked with Jase. The result? Not so good. We’ve officially gone our separate ways. The saddest part of it all? I think he’s always been the ass he is now; he was just better at hiding it before.

But she was right—it did give me closure.

It also opened me up to the change I was searching for. It freed me. I wasn’t tied to anyone any longer. I didn’t have to be someone else. I could be me, free and clear, and damn did it feel good.

I found my passion for writing again and decided to start a blog. It’s nothing major, but it’s a good outlet for…well, everything. On top of that, I’ve become an amateur astrologist, took a cooking class with Fish, and got a tattoo.

Most importantly, I found happiness, sometimes in major changes and sometimes in the smallest of things, even when I thought I couldn’t.

My job at the bowling alley came to a close at the end of the summer and it was a bittersweet goodbye. Somehow Carsen and I managed to work seamlessly together. We were cordial, and it almost felt natural. You’d have never guessed by looking at us that at one point, I was certain I was falling in love with him.

Actually, I’m still certain of that. There’s no way I wasn’t going to fall for him. He came out of nowhere and we collided like stars in the night sky. It was fast and brutal. The buildup was slow and the burnout inevitable. He gave me so much in so little time, and I’ll keep that close to my heart for a long time to come.

I miss him, every day. There hasn’t been one day that’s gone by where I haven’t wondered how he is, how he’s getting along, if he’s found peace. I’ve attempted many times to stealthily ask the boyfriends how he is during our coffee dates on campus, but the courage flees before I’m able to—though since they haven’t mentioned anything, I’m assuming he’s doing as okay as he can be.

I cling to that assumption.

I glance at my phone and note that class starts in less than two minutes. Students rush in, barely beating the clock.

A tingle starts at the base of my spine when someone slips into the seat next to me. It’s soft but persistent, and I don’t have to look over to know who it is. I haven’t felt this since…

“This seat isn’t taken, is it?”

His voice slides over me like velvet, and my whole body heats up like it hasn’t in months.

I’m frozen in my chair, too shocked to look over at him.

What if he’s not real? What if I’m making this up in my head because I want him to be real so badly? But that wouldn’t explain the way my body is lighting up…

“I’m hoping that’s a no.”

That voice.

Finally, I cast my eyes his way, and when our gazes connect, everything feels…right.

To many, he’d look the same as he did six months ago. His brown hair is a chaotic mess and his lips are the same full, kissable ones they’ve always been. His jaw is still lined with that constant stubble and his nose is as sharp as ever.

But his eyes? Oh, man, his eyes. They’re the clearest I’ve ever seen them. Gone is the weight he carried around, the unfathomable guilt. His steel stare is happy—genuinely—and full of hope.

He’s changed, and it’s a damn good change.

“No, it’s not taken.”

“Good. That’s good.” He grins and sticks his hand out. “Hi. I’m Carsen Wheatley. I’m a new student here. Have any pointers for me?”

I try not to laugh. The moment I clasp his hand in mine, my skin is on fire. He pulls me in toward him.

“Elliott Mathers, and yeah, I have a little advice.”

He raises a brow. “Yeah?”

“Keep your hands off the nacho cheese sauce in the food court.”

THE END