“I’m not akinkysexy naked genius. Simmer down.”
She giggles. “Your hard dick proves otherwise.”
“Fair enough,” I say before covering her mouth with mine again.
I continue trailing my hand up her leg, ignoring the juncture between her legs and dragging it up until I reach her heaving breasts. I cup the right one, dropping my lips from hers so I can suck her pert nipple into my mouth. I love her nipples. Her hands instantly fall to my head, holding me against her chest, telling me she loves the way I love her nipples. Pulling back, I grin up at her and continue my tongue-lashing on her other bud. She moans and writhes and begs for more, and I fucking love every second of it.
I love it when I finally seal my hand over the center of her spread legs. I love it when I map out a pattern on both her lips. I love it when she gasps as I ease a finger, then two into her. I love it when she pushes down for more and begs—fuckingbegs—me to never stop.
But I love it the most when she falls apart around me.
As soon as I start to drag her from the countertop and rush us both back to the bedroom, she lets out a shriek.
“OUCH! MOTHERFU—DAMMIT! SON OF A BITCH!”
I immediately drop her back to the countertop. She clutches her hand to her leg as I step back to assess the damage. She leans as far away from the stove as possible, lifting her ass off the counter so whatever’s hurting her doesn’t press against it.
“Ohmygod. Ohmygod. Oh my fucking god! Gaige, get me down! Now! It hurts!” Tears pour from her eyes and I stand there frozen, unsure of what to do even though she just told me exactly what to do.
When I don’t move, she yells, “PLEASE!”
Her garbled plea springs me into action and I gently lift her from the counter so her ass doesn’t scrape against it. She starts hopping up and down once I place her on the floor, twirling fast in circles like a dog trying to grab its own tail.
“How bad is it? Ohmygod. Tell me how bad it is!”
I throw my hands out, ceasing her movements. “Babe, calm down. I can’t see anything with you jumping around. What the hell happened?”
“I told you we shouldn’t cook naked! That’s what happened!” She spins around and points to her ass. At the bottom curve of her right cheek is a nasty red burn. Correction: there are three curved burns. “I burned my ass on the stove!”
“How is that even possible?”
“Dammit, I don’t know! We must have moved around too much and when you went to swoop me off the counter I hit it. I mean, it was getting hot in here and all, but I didn’t think it was from the stove. Is it bad?”
I bend down, getting a closer look at it. “I mean, it’s not good.” Standing, I smirk at her. “Your ass still looks fantastic though.”
She whacks my chest. “This is not funny, Gaige Addams! It fuckinghurts!”
“I know, I know. I’m sorry, but it’s true.” Her lips twitch and I drag her into my arms, trying to soothe away the last of her tears. “Do you want to go to the hospital? It’s already blistering.”
She cries harder and I take that as a yes.
“Mr. Addams?”
“Yes?”
“You can go on back now. They’re done dressing the burn.”
“How is she?”
The gray-haired nurse smiles. “Embarrassed.”
If I didn’t think my wife would cut off my balls if she ever found out, I’d high-five the nurse for that one. Tipping my head toward him, I mutter a thanks and make my way to her designated area.
I pull back the curtain and give my pitiful-looking wife a sad, sympathetic smile. I kiss her head and smooth back the sweaty mess of hair matted to her forehead. “How’d it go?”
“It hurt like a son of a bitch. I’m mad at you, you know.”
“That’s not fair,” I say, pointing at her. “We both agreed cooking naked would be fun.”
