Niall arched an eyebrow. “And you would know this how?” Few betas ventured into heat hotels, other than the rare ones partnered with omegas.
“Fine.” Jax snorted. “We smell like how I imagine a heat hotel would smell.”
Niall smiled. Placing a gentle hand on Jax’s wrist, he asked, “Are you awake enough to talk after we get cleaned up? I had something I wanted to speak to you about before I got distracted by your gorgeous body.”
Jax’s cheek ticked up. “Yeah, I’m good.” He rubbed a hand across his jaw before adding, “There’s actually something I need to discuss with you too.”
His serious tone put Niall on alert. “Everything okay?”
“Yeah.” Jax scraped his hand along his jaw. “But I don’t think you’re gonna like it.”
Chapter Nine
Jax
Jax and Niall sat up in bed against the headboard. The clock on the side table read 1:54 a.m.
Both men were wide awake.
Jax pulled his boyfriend close, nosing into the crook of Niall’s slim neck. As betas, they didn’t emit scents the way alphas and omegas did, but Jax still found the smell of a freshly-showered Niall incredibly appealing.
Niall kissed his head. “Okay, Jax. What is this thing that is somehow okay, but also, you don’t think I’ll like it? We’re both comfortable, clean, and sexually sated. Hit me with it. I’m ready.”
Tilting his head up, Jax placed a kiss on Niall’s smooth chin. “Alright… So, long story short, there was a meeting at the office today, and I’ve been selected to lead the new Hampson Towers project.”
Niall’s brows drew together. “Project lead. Isn’t that good news?”
“For my career, yes. But for us, not so much. It means I’ll be traveling a lot over the next six months.” He leaned back, folding his tattooed arms over his naked chest. “The job site is almost five hours away by car. Hampson is going to pay for me to have an apartment there. I’ll probably only be able to come home on weekends, if that, possibly a few other chunks of days when I can get away.”
“Oh.” Niall blew out a careful breath, sitting up straighter. “I mean, it sucks, but it’s not forever, right? Only six months?”
“Yeah. But that’s a long time to be apart so much.”
Jax hid his face from Niall, worried he might give something away in his expression. While Niall had done nothing overt to merit Jax’s doubt, Jax had a nagging feeling it wasn’t a good idea to be away from one another for long stretches. He couldn’t describe it exactly, but there seemed to be this piece of distance between them, even though everything else about their relationship was wonderful.
Jax knew it could be his imagination. But even if it was all in his head, it was past time they discussed it. Yet he struggled with how to broach the subject, not wanting it to sound like an accusation.
Why does it feel like there’s something important you’re not telling me?
Niall reached for Jax’s hand, forcing him to uncross his arms and twine their fingers together.
“Jax, I think we’ll be okay when you take this job—and of course, you have to take it. Itisa long time, but we can manage, and it’ll be worth it in the end.”
Resting his gaze on Niall’s earnest face, Jax knew it was now or never.
“I know that logically, but in my heart, I have this fear, like, if I go away for so long, we won’t be the same.” He paused. “Truthfully, there are times when…when it feels like you’reholding a part of yourself back from me.” Niall sucked in a breath, and Jax continued hurriedly, “I mean, you say and do all the right things. And I know how much you love me. Not just because you tell me, but because I feel it… But I also don’t think I’m imagining that flicker ofsomethingyou’re not telling me. And it scares me.”
Silence enveloped the room like a cloud. The only noise was the whip of curtains in front of the open window. Jax waited for Niall to get upset, or to scoff at Jax’s insecurity.
Instead, Niall sat frozen. An indeterminate sound escaped his throat before he coughed it away and eyed Jax. “You know I’d never intentionally do anything to hurt you, right?”
Icy dread seeped into Jax’s bones. “I think so.”
“I would never betray you. It’s not something you need to worry about.”
Jax should have felt relieved by the words, but Niall’s expression didn’t inspire confidence. “Why are you saying it like that?”
Niall appeared lost for a moment. “I thought I was protecting you. Now I see how foolish I was to believe you wouldn’t see right through me.”
