Noddingslowly, I replied, “Sure, Finley. Sounds good.”
Then,we left the car, to go our separate ways, and while I couldn't say what wasgoing on in Finley's head, I knew mine was wondering what plans he had for meonce we were alone again.
CHAPTER TWENTY-EIGHT
ROSIE
I wasdreading the moment when Alec would walk back through the door. I wasanticipated the awkward silence and hurt glances so much, that my stomach hadtied itself into a thousand knots and my willingness to eat anything hadcompletely diminished. TJ noticed, as Rick and I drove him to the airport, andhe made mention of it before boarding his plane.
“Mom,what happened?”
“Nothing,”I told him, shruggingcasuallyand forcing a grin thatinstantly pained my cheeks. “I'm fine. I'm just exhausted.”
“Yeah,but you've been weird since this morning. Did Brodie say something, or—”
“No,”I lied point blank. “I'm telling you, nothing happened. I just haven't sleptsince we got here. But I'll be okay. Once we finish up here, I'll be able tosleep, and …” I shrugged as my voice trailed off. Because how could I know forsure that I'd find sleep once Gracie's killer was found? How could I be socertain I'd ever sleep again?
“Areyou sure you're okay with me leaving?”
Ilooked over my shoulder to see Rick waiting patiently, as he stood next to apillar with his phone in hand. He wasn't watching us say our goodbyes, and Iwas grateful for it.In the event thatthis was thelast time I’d ever see my son, I wanted it to be private.
“I'mmore okay with you leaving than having you stay,” I replied honestly, as Iturned back to TJ.
Histune had changed since he was told he'd be leaving. He seemed more willing andanxious to get out of here, and I wondered if he had spoken again to his dad.Maybe Tom had convinced him better than I could that leaving was the best thingfor him, but I wasn’t going to ask.
TJreluctantly nodded, gripping the strap of his backpack tighter. “But you'd tellme if you weren't, right?”
Ilied and said, “Of course, I would.”
Then,with a quick hug, an ache in my heart, and a crashing wave of relief, I watchedmy son enter the terminal and fade from my sight.
AsRick and I drove back to the house, my anxiety nearly mounted to a full-fledgedpanic attack. I knew Alec would be waiting to visit the woods where he foundGracie's dead body, and I was terrified. I hated to think of what he would sayafter I ran away from him last night, and I dreaded the longing I knew I wouldfeel at the sight of his lips and surly demeanor. But most of all, I was soafraid of entering the clearing and seeing the place I only knew from pictures,and to know once and for all if her ghost lingered there or not.
Justas I expected, Alec was at the house when we returned, waiting on the couchwith a glass of whisky in hand. I considered making a joke to break the ice,about him needing booze to face me again, but thought better of it when heslowly dragged his eyes over my body before greeting my face.
“Ithought we should go as the sun sets,” he said, speaking as though we hadn'tspent the better part of a half hour making out last night.
Inodded. “Okay, sounds good.”
“Yewannadress insomethin'dark,” he commented, gesturing toward my lavender t-shirt and light blue jeans.“Wewannablend in with the night, not stand out.”
Notingthat he had already changed out of his work clothes and into a fitted blacksweater and dark jeans, I soundlessly nodded. Then, as I went to find a moresuitable outfit, I cursed him under my breath for looking even better in casualattire than he did in a wrinkled shirt and tie.
***
Thedrive toCoilleFeannagwasslow and nerve-wracking. Every nightmare I had suffered over the past fewnights came rushing back, flashing through my head like a ghoulish photo albumofnot so distantmemories. Every streetlamp lightbecame Gracie's pale, unblinking face, every shadow became the horrors in thenight, and I cowered in my seat, desperate for an escape from my horrible mind.
“Yeall right?”
Startledby his voice, I turned to look at Alec, immediately grateful for the chance atconversation, and shook my head.
“No,I'm definitely not all right,” I replied, laughing without humor.
“Yedidnaehave to come.”
“Ihave to,” I insisted, although I was unsure about why at this point.
Shruggingand shaking his head, he said, “I understand, but if ye're that uncomfortable,yecouldaejust trusted me to go.”
