“Idon’t think I need to—” His words were stopped with a wince and his fingers duginto his chest. I quickly made the decision to get him on the bed while Igrabbed the phone and called 911.
Theparamedics came. Pops protested weakly as they got him onto a gurney and rushedhim down to the ambulance. I took the ride with them to the hospital, speedingthrough New York City traffic, and once we were there and he was admitted, Icalled Zach and Jenna to tell them where we were.
Ofcourse, they wanted to know what was wrong, but I didn’t know. They wanted toknow if it was his heart, but I didn’t know. They wanted to know if he wasstable, if he was okay, but I didn’t fucking know. It angered me that theywould ask, and it infuriated me even more that I was too useless to have anyanswers for them.
Thebeeping monitors put my worried mind on a fast train back to his heart attack.When he had been in Intensive Care and everything was so touch and go. Jennahad sat Zach and me down and told us we needed to make some decisions that noneof us were prepared to make, in the event he took a turn for the worse. ButPops had been given his second chance at life, and now, I worried he wouldn’tbe granted a third.
“Junior.”
Withmy thumb nail between my teeth, I took a glance at him, laying in his bed, soalert and aware. “Yeah?”
“You’rescarin’ the shit out of me, boy.”
Loweringmy hand, I forced a pained smile. “Sorry.”
Helifted a hand slightly, as to not disturb his IV, and waved toward the door.“Get outta here.”
“What?”I asked, taken aback.
“Youheard me. Get outta here. Go smoke or somethin’.”
Withjaw slack and eyes wide, I shook my head. “What are you, crazy? I’m not leavingyou here.”
“I’mnot sayin’ toleave,” he groaned, rolling his eyes. “I’m just sayin’,get some air. You’re makin’ me nervous.”
Ipulled in a deep breath and released it as I stood up, eyeing him warily. Popsrolled his eyes again and said, “I’m not gonna die if you leave, Vinnie.”
Alarmedby the D word, but not wanting to show it, I chuckled and turned toward thedoor before I could get choked up. “You better not,” I managed to say, thenleft the room.
Asmuch as I didn’t want to leave, the moment I was outside in the hallway, Iexhaled, unaware that I’d been holding my breath. My shoulders felt just alittle lighter and my chest felt just a little less constricted. There wasstill a fear in walking away, as though his life was dependent on my beingthere at his side, but I resigned myself to moving down the hallway and to theelevator in the waiting room.
Istepped into the small room, and just as I pushed the button to call theelevator, the sliding doors opened and out stepped a woman in scrubs, lookingdown at her phone as she bumped into me.
“Oh!”she exclaimed and took a step back, looking up past her thick-framed glassesand into my eyes. “I’m so—” Her words were abruptly cut short as she cocked herhead, her gaze flooding with recognition. “It’syou.”
AsI shot an arm out to stop the elevator doors from closing, I raised an eyebrow.“Me?”
Shelooked at me as if I should know her, as if I should’ve immediately recognizedher, the way you would with an old friend. But I didn’t, and when she realizedthat wasn’t going to happen, her face fell, disheartened and disappointed.
“Imet you at the Regina Miller show,” she said. “Outside, remember? You didn’thave your lighter.”
Itipped my head as recollection settled in, remembering a tight tank top andlittle denim shorts. “That’s right. You’re the wiseass who thinks she’s afake.”
Shesighed. “I don’tthinkshe’s a fake, Iknowshe is. But whatever,yeah, that’s me. I’m glad you remember.”
Snorting,I nodded. “Sure, whatever you say. Anyway, it was nice seein’ you again. Have agood night.” Then, I stepped into the elevator and let the doors close, allwhile noticing she hadn’t walked away.
***
Aftersmoking and getting a breath of air, I headed back upstairs to find Popsasleep. At his side was a nurse, dressed in scrubs and a sloppy, blonde bun.When she heard me enter the room, she turned to stare at me with now familiar,blue eyes.
“Wejust keep bumping into each other,” she laughed.
“You’rehis nurse?”
Sherolled her eyes and turned back to her computer screen. “No, I just thought I’dcreep on him for no reason.”
Stiflinga groan, I dropped back in my chair. “Do they know what’s goin’ on with himyet?”
