AfterMama and Sarah had lectured me on what to do for Molly’s birthday, Sarahinsisted I come alone tonight. I knew it would’ve bothered Molly, though, andclearly it did. She was hopelessly devoted to her mother, and that mother hadpurposely missed seeing her daughter perform at her first big show in her homestate for the sake of my romantic gesture. Clearly, it hadn’t given the effectSarah had been hoping for.
“She’scomin’ to Austin,” I offered, hoping that wouldsoften the blow.
“Yeah.”She released a rueful sigh and nodded, decidedly changing her tone. “I feellike I haven’t seen you in a long time.”
“Ithasbeen a pretty long time,” I agreed. “I feel like I’ve beenfightin’ a war.”
“Well,you have been, in a way. But you look good.” My eyes shifted from the road tohers. Was she complimenting my appearance? Or was she simplymakingan observation aboutmy health? Dammit, why couldn’t I tell? Mollysmiled shyly, a look I hadn’t seen in a long time. “Take that as you will.”
Ichuckled, looking back to the road. “Well, thanks. You look good, too.” Iglanced back at her, making no secret of the way my eyes dragged over her body.“And there’s only one way to take that.”
Hergiggle was damn near wild as her hands clapped over her cheeks, to try and hidethe furious blush that rose from the collar of her shirt to the tip of hernose. “Oh, my God,” she gushed, still laughing.
“Wasthat weird?” I laughed with her, gripping my hands against the wheel. Restlessand anxious.
“Ifeel like it should be, right? But it’s not. Why isn’t it weird?” Her handsabruptly dropped to her lap as she turned in her seat to face me. “Oh, my God,wait. This is adate… isn’t it?”
Iheld tight to the wheel to keep my hands from shaking. Jesus. I hadn’t beenthis nervous around a girl since I was a teenager, and I hadn’t been this sureabout a girl since … never. I didn’t want to screw this up. I didn’t want toscare her away.
“Doesit make it weird if I say yes?”
Shehesitated. God, I wish she hadn’t done that. It gave my hands time to growclammy and stick to the wheel. I wondered whether she’d notice if I reachedover and cranked the AC a little higher …
“No,”she answered softly, shaking her head.
Withthat little word, my confidencepulsedand my headnodded. “Good,” I replied, steeling a glance from the road to eye her hands,laying in her lap. “Then, is it weird if I dothis?”
Ireleased the wheel, praying my hand wasn’t too clammy to be noticeable, andtook one of hers. Interlocked our fingers and felt that jolt of lifezapmy heart, the way I had before, when she’d taken my handon stage.
I can’t wait to seethosepictures all over the internet later.
Hereyes dropped to her lap, to take in the sight of our hands. Like she couldn’tquite believe it by feel, and it was the sight that made it a reality. Iworried she’d let go, that she’d declare it was too much, too soon, too fast.Maybe she wanted to take things one small, barely detectable step at a time.But then, she smiled. Her eyes watered, and … dammit, she better notcry, because if she did, I’dfreakin’lose it.
Shakingher head, she whispered, “No. It’s not weird.”
“Good,”I replied and squeezed her hand. Just to hold on a little tighter.
***
Whatnormally would’ve been a two-and-a-half-hour drive, took us nearly four, aftermaking three bathroom stops at two gas stations and a Target. I didn’t admit asmuch, but it was why I’d been late to the show in the first place, and withevery apologetic turn into another parking lot, I became exceedingly morefrustrated. The night already felt ruined in my mind, as my plans were set backwith every minute wasted in pain.
“Sorry,”I muttered under my breath for what was probably the millionth time. “Hopefullythat’s the last one.”
“It’sokay.” And I knew she meant it. I knew it’d never bother her. But dammit, itbotheredme.
“So,on a scale of one to ten, how awful is this as far as first dates go?” I pulledback onto the road and laughed uneasily at my own self-deprecating joke.
“It’snot awful,” she insisted, reaching for my hand.
Fingersinterlaced and our hands draped over the center console. It was immediatelycalming, to hold her hand and know what it meant. I smiled at the road,anxiously thinking about the plans that awaited us at our destination. I hopedshe wouldn’t be disappointed. I hoped it lived up to my expectations.
Whenwe pulled up to the curb, I watched her face and waited for a reaction. Slowlyher browpinchedand she hesitated before turning fromthe window to look at me.
“Youbrought mehere?”
Thereit was, the uncertainty and disappointment, and I laughed. “Yep.”
“Toyourparents’house?” She laughed with incredulity. “You mightwannaask that scale of one to ten question right aboutnow.”
