“Well,you know those music types,” she said with amore timidsmile. Shy, her blush deepening.
Thinkingabout Robbie, I chewed at my inner cheek and nodded. “Yeah, I do,” I said, as Iwondered if Robbie White had ever been like me at one point. Nice, gentlemanly.It was hard to imagine, but wasn’t it possible that the rock star lifestyle iswhat had ultimately destroyed him and any redeeming qualities?
Thehostess greeted us with a wide grin. “A table for two?” and I nodded, feelingthe guilt of being out with a woman who wasn’t Kylie.
“Rightthis way, please,” she continued, grabbing two menus, as she led us towards asmall table.
Iwhipped my head around at the sight of a giant alligator and asked, “Is thatthing real?”
“Oh,him?” the hostess asked with a light laugh. “He won’t biteya,honey, don’t you worry.”
“Butit’sreal?”
Westopped at a small table covered with a gingham cloth. The checkerboard patternreminded me of the chess games at the nursing home, and fucking hell, I missedBilly.
Iwondered how he’d feel about me now.
“Asreal as you and me,” she said with a beaming grin, and then she laughed. “Or,well, at least he was at one point.”
“Right,”I said with an uncomfortable nod as I pulled out Becca’s chair.
“Wouldyou like to hear our specials for the night, or wouldyajust like to take a look at the menu while you wait for your waiter?”
Beccasmiled up at her. “We’ll just wait, thanks.”
“Surething, honey. Enjoy your meal, all right?”
Andwith that, she was gone, back to her station at the door and Becca looked to meas I sat down.
“You’reafraid of a littleol’ gator, huh?” she said with ateasing glint in her eye.
Grabbingmy menu, I glared at her from across the table. “There’s nothing little aboutthat thing. But no, I’m notafraidof it. I’m just not a big fan oflooking at what I’m about to eat.”
“You’relookin’ at me, aren’tya?”
Icoughed, choking on nothing as my gaze dropped to the table. I could hear thesiren’s song, luring me to my demise, but that was normal, I told myself. Itwasdifferentand it was going to feel strange, but Iwould get over it. Just as I had been with all those women before, while myheart always, always belonged to her.
Howhad I done it then? How had I looked at someone else without her eyes, withouther hair? I couldn’t remember, but once upon a time, that’s exactly what I did.I could do it again.
“Tooforward forya?” she asked, and I lifted my eyes backto her.
“No,”I replied honestly. “I’m just, uh, getting out of a very long-termrelationship.”
Beccanodded sympathetically. “Don’t worry, I’ll be gentle withya.”Her cheeks flushed with the hint of what was to come later in the night and Ilonged for my bottle of whiskey. “Anyway, I’ll switch places with you, soyou’re nothavin’ to look right at Mr. Gator overthere. Would that makeyafeel better?”
“Actually,”I said, “it would.” And with that, we traded places. A short-lived game ofmusical chairs. “Thank you.”
“Quitewelcome. Now, I recommend the crispy gator and the sweet tea. Unless you’re aroot beer guy, in which case,Albita’sis amazing. Doyou have that where you’re from?”
“Can’tsay we do, but I do love a good root beer.”
“Then,that’s what you’regettin’.”
Ourserver came by and Becca did the honors of ordering for us both. I watched hertalk about cornmaquechoux with a look of confusionplastered over my face, and when the waitress walked away, I asked, “What thehell did you just order for me?”
“Wow,you’re not the most adventurous, areya?”
Iglanced up from my menu allowed myself a look at her unnaturally red hair. Theframe of fire illuminated her tawny skin and cinnamon eyes. With her full lipsand concaved cheeks, she had the features of a magazine model, with a body tomatch, and that traitor in my pants didn’t care that my heart was inConnecticut. He stirred, and I dropped my eyes back to the laminated pages inmy hands.
