I sat in the waiting room for a long time. They wouldn’tallow me to see him. I wasn’t family, they said, and I was mad, because Ialways had been. But the hospital hadn’t seen it that way, and they hadn’tunderstood my relationship to the McKenna Family. I even tried pulling the CopCard without luck, and so I sat. Working my hands in my hair, draining my phonebattery, shaking my legs.
I missed the movie, but Meghan understood. Christine had gottenher wish, and I was certain she was happy, but I wasn’t. I felt like a failureof a dad that night, and maybe I was. But then, Kate McKenna ran into thewaiting room, heading straight toward me, and all thoughts of inadequacy meltedwith my heart at the sight of her tears.
I stood up, and she crashed into my chest, wrapping herarms around me.
“Kate …” I said her name with apprehension, tightening myarms around her, tipping my chin against the top of her head.
“Oh God, Patrick,” she said with a heaving sigh, her voicewatered down with her tears. “I’m so sorry I didn’t come out here sooner. Theytold me you were here. I was just—”
“No, no. It’s fine.” I shook my head, squeezing her againstme. “What happened? Is he okay?”
The question brought on another wave of tears, and shesoftly cried against me. A few minutes dragged on before she took a step back,wiping her hands against her sodden face, and she shook her head.
“I’m sorry. Ugh, God, I am such a mess right now.”
“The hell are youapologizin’for?”
She smiled weakly, gesturing toward my shirt. “I got youruniform all wet.”
I stared at her incredulously. “You’rekiddin’me, right? I don’t give a shite about my uniform, Kate. What happened to yourdad? Someone said he had a heart attack?”
She nodded, catching a tear as it trickled down her cheek.“Yeah, he, uh ... collapsed at work, and someone called an ambulance. Thedoctors say heshouldbe okay, but he has two blockages, and he needsstents. He’ll be in the ICU tonight until they take him into surgery tomorrow,and then, I guess we’ll go from there.”
My throat constricted, and I swallowed forcefully, blinkingup at the bright fluorescent lights. It was all too familiar, as I rememberedmy own father and the heart attack he had suffered three years before. He hadsurvived, and I thought the risk of losing my dad so soon had passed. But thereI was, facing the possibility of losing the man who was next in line on my listof Father Figures.
“Christ, Kate,” I said, my voice gruff, the words choked. Icleared my throat, and looked down to her. “You’ll let me know if you guys needanythin’, okay? I don’t wantyato hesitate ifyaneed someone to watch the kids.”
She nodded. “I’m sure we’ll be fine, but thank you.”
“I’m serious. Even if you just need someone to do thefeckin’ laundry and make sureyahave clean clothes, I want you to call me, okay? And tell your mom that, too.”
Her lip trembled, and she nodded again. “Thank you,Patrick. Really, I appreciate that.”
A buzzing came from her pocket, and she pulled her phoneout. She tapped over the screen with agitation, and she sighed. “You know, Iswear to God …”
“Huh?”
“My stupid sister.”
And that was all I needed for my blood to pump faster throughmy veins, my heart to start palpitating, my hands to go clammy, and my jaw todrop open.
Her stupid sister.
Ten years of paying bills, learning to cook, perfecting amean braid, going to soccer practice, and sleeping in separate rooms hadn’twiped her from my memory. I mean, sure, I kept myself busy. I spent my daysprotecting the streets of River Canyon and hanging out with the coolest kid Iknow, but come nighttime, all I could think about was her. The one that gotaway.
Kinsey McKenna.
My sweet thing across the Long Island Sound.
I’d laugh about it sometimes, lying on the couch in mybasement. I had to cross the pond to give her my heart, and she had to crossthe Sound to take it away.
It wasn’t very funny, but I’d laugh anyway, because what elsecould I do? I couldn’t just call her up, beg for her to take me back—I wasmarried. Not happily, but married nonetheless, and I wasn’t a cheater. Anarsehole, maybe, for allowing my soul to remain tethered to another woman, butI wasn’t in the habit of being unfaithful.
“Patrick?”
Kate’s voice stole me from my thoughts, and with a gasp, Iscrambled to lay her memory back in my heart, tucking it in where it hadremained hidden for all those years.
“What was that?” I asked, my voice hoarse.
