Then he sucks in an anguished breath.
“They’re dead.They’re all fucking dead,” Manic’s horrified whisper pierces my ear.
The phone slips from my hand, shattering against the concrete as my soul splinters.
My anguished roar echoes through the sky, a pleading cry to anyone willing to listen, as I drop to my knees.
I claw at my chest, needing to rid myself of this horrible fucking agony ripping my heart to shreds.
Without them, I’m nothing.
Just an untethered soul stuck in purgatory.
Blindly, I reach for the gun holstered at my side.The weight of it resting in my hand is the only answer I have.
The gun skids across the concrete as a booted foot kicks it away and pain shoots through my arm.
Fingers wrap in my hair and yanks my head back until I’m peering up into my grandfather’s furious eyes.“Lock it down.”
His words don’t register.They’re a buzz against a brain clouded with grief.
But then he gets in my face, his glassy, anguish-filled eyes pleading with me.“Lock.It.The.Fuck.Down.”
“I can’t breathe,” I gasp, grabbing at my throat.
Gavel’s form wavers in front of me as my sight is blinded by the tears pouring from me.
“It’s okay, son.I have enough oxygen left to breathe for both of us.”
Chapter Forty-Two
SincethedayPopeinformed me that Frankie was no longer a problem, I’ve woken with a smile on my face and lightness in my heart.Fear has taken up a tiny spot in the back of my mind, creating a home I can’t seem to evict it from, but I don’t let it control me anymore.
I don’t want to live my life afraid.
Verena helped me find confidence in the woman I was before Frankie tried extinguishing her.
Each morning, my kids watch me with wide eyes filled with wonder as I dance through the house.They smile and laugh at the happiness that radiates from me.
The uncertainty of who helped Spunky lingers, a reminder that there’s still a piece to the puzzle that’s missing.
Pope had things to do at the club today, but I’ve kept myself and the kids at home.It feels like the safest bet right now.My home is familiar to me, and I know who is within the walls of my space.I haven’t told Pope yet, but I enrolled in some online college classes.That was something Frankie never allowed.He couldn’t control someone if they’re not under his thumb twenty-four-seven.
It’s time I do something with my life.Something I can be proud of myself for.As much as I love Pope, our past together taught me how stupid it is to be unprepared for the unexpected.If it wasn’t for the safe full of money I took from him, I wouldn’t have had a way to support myself and the babies until I could work.
There’s a trust that Dad and Grandfather left me, Val, and Cyanide, but I haven’t touched it.I wanted the kids to have that nest egg if something ever happened to me.
I haven’t decided completely what I want to get a degree in, but figured business classes wouldn’t hurt anything.
There were about eight Saint’s Outlaws who showed up an hour ago and stationed themselves around the house.I knew some of them, like Banjo, Dash, Riffraff, and Handlebar.The others I wasn’t as familiar with since they weren’t around seven years ago.
Cyanide was with them and informed me that Pope wanted extra protection on the house because some shit has happened.These are the men my brother chose, that he trusts to keep us safe, so I’m doing the same.
He wouldn’t tell me what and he seemed in a hurry to get back to helping Pope, so I didn’t want to hold him any longer.Whatever Pope needed him for was important enough that he needed to make sure we’re covered.
The kids haven’t noticed anything, thankfully.
I don’t expect it to stay that way, but I’m keeping them oblivious to the men roaming around outside for as long as I can.
