“Of course. Don’t let the asshole bully you.” She gave him a teasing wave.
When she’d said things like that about Benjamin, she’d always meant them. They’d been a warning that I hadn’t heeded. I hoped I knew her well enough to be right when I said she approved of my mate choice this time.
“I would never bully her,” West huffed under his breath.
As she retreated, he wandered closer until he was leaning against the post that held up the swing. He wouldn’t look me in the eye. I got the swing in motion again, taking comfort in the swaying.
I hoped he would speak first, but he didn’t.
“You didn’t stay with me,” I said after a long, awkward silence.
“Might have made things worse if I had.”
“How?”
He kicked his toe against the gravel, shrugging. “If Conrad is the pack’s good luck charm, I’m its curse.”
I planted my feet on the ground, stopping the swing. “That’s bullshit. Who the hell told you that?”
“It doesn’t matter, Talia. Just forget I said anything.”
He turned toward the path, about to leave meagain, but I darted up and stood in his way. I saw his chest move with his sharp inhale, noticed the dilation of his pupils as he caught my scent.
The man wanted me. He’d always fucking wanted me, and during my heat I thought I would be able to have him for good.
And then the heat had ended, my needs weren’t as potent, and he went right back to being the same dumbass he’d been since the beginning.
I placed my hand on his chest, pushing him backward. He could have stayed where he was with very little effort, but he let me move him. I didn’t stop until his back was pressed against the tall concrete wall that blocked off the rooftop garden. I was standing close enough that I had to tilt my head up to see his eyes.
His arms hung by his sides, but I knew he wanted to grab me by the hips. He could easily switch our positions so I was the one stuck between a rock and a hard place.
“What are you trying to accomplish by staying away from me?” I asked. “Mercer and Conrad—they’re already all in. You told me during my heat that you wanted me. Was that a lie?”
“I want you. I can’t have you, though. I would?—”
“Shut up, West.”
He swallowed down the rest of his words.
“You want me, and I want you.”
I almost told him I loved him—the words were on the tip of my tongue, but I worried they would scare him off. With my horrible bond still fresh, I couldn’t risk that amount of rejection. I would break.
“That’s enough to start,” I continued. “Any problems, we work through together. All of us. And I mean problems inside and outside. You helped me through the heat from hell, so I wantto help you with whatever is stopping you from giving in and being with me properly.”
His eyes glistened, and I knew he wouldn’t want me to see. I pressed my cheek to his chest, arms wrapping around him.
“I don’t want to hurt you.” He whispered it like he was voicing a sin.
“You’re only hurting me by pushing me away.”
I felt his body relax, and his arms came to wrap around me. “Fucking hell, that’s pretty much what Violet said too.”
“Maybe because we’re not lying.” I failed to keep the sarcasm out of my tone.
Luckily, he chuckled. “Yeah, that would explain a few things.”
He kissed the top of my head. West was mine for real, it seemed. Which was good, because I didn’t know how many micro-rejections I could take. I wanted to strengthen my barrier against Benjamin—I wanted to prepare myself for the idea of killing him to take back my freedom.
