Dalton
I couldn’t believe I’d finally gotten Jesse beneath me. That he loved me, too. That he wanted any kind of future with me. I for sure had thought he was intentionally putting distance between us. Maybe I’d been reading him all wrong and the guys were right. We just needed to communicate.
“You okay?” I murmured when Jesse shifted and winced.
A light blush stained his cheeks that I found absolutely adorable. “Yeah. Just… sore,” he said quietly.
I’d taken as much care as I could with stretching him open and preparing him to take me, but I also knew Jesse was a virgin. While he hadn’t remained one out of some sense of purity, he was always cautious about who he let near his body like that. Hell, I could probably count on one hand the number of times Jesse had actually allowed himself to be kissed.
The metaphorical wall he put up around his body was understandable, considering all his trauma. And I didn’t take it lightly that he let me not only kiss him but touch him. Make love to him.
Christ, it still seemed a little surreal.
He relaxed back against me, his cheek pressed to my chest as he focused back on the TV. After I’d cleaned us both up, I’d gone to see if our food had been delivered—which it had. Spike had been in the kitchen and had simply smirked at me as he pointed to the bag on the counter. His smirk said it all. No doubt, he’d come to let me know my food had arrived but had instead heard me and Jesse together. I mean, neither of us had been all that quiet.
Being quiet had been the literal last thing on my mind when Jesse’s body had been wrapped around me and I’d finally been inside of him, making him mine.
We’d eaten, then continued lounging in my bed, choosing to watch TV and pretend the world outside of my room didn’t exist. I knew we would eventually have to deal with Jesse’s mom’s things and decide what to do with her body, but for now, I’d let Jesse have this.
He deserved it after the mess he’d become the night before.
“Why did you pull away from me when we moved here?” Jesse suddenly blurted.
“What?” I asked, frowning down at him. I hadn’t pulled away from him. He had pulled away from me, hadn’t he? As soon as the six of us had moved in here, a whole ocean had separated me and Jesse.
He drew in a deep breath, and he began twist and untwist his fingers in the blanket covering us, a nervous tick he’d never broken. “I… When we moved here, you said it would be good if we all had separate rooms,” he said quietly. “You pulled away from me.”
My brows furrowed. “What?” I asked again. Because surely, he wasn’t telling me all the space between us was my fucking fault. If we’d been apart for months, a wedge driven between us, because of me, I was going to fucking hate myself.
He swallowed thickly. “You did,” he said quietly. “When we all sat down and talked about buying this place, and you said it. I thought…”
My chest fucking hurt. I tightened my arm around him and gripped his chin with my other hand, tilting his head back so he was forced to look up at me. He could’ve closed his eyes to avoid my gaze, but he didn’t, thankfully.
“Is that what you thought, baby? That I didn’t fucking want to share a room with you anymore? That I suddenly wanted space from you?” He didn’t answer me, but the pain in his eyes said it all. Closing my eyes, I released his chin and thunked my head back against the headboard, blowing out a harsh breath. “Jesus Christ,” I swore. Lifting my head, I looked back down at his pretty face. “God, Jesse, no. I never wanted that. You could’ve had your own space, but I still wanted you in my bed every fucking night or me in yours. Just like always. That never changed. I thought…”
I’d thought he was tired of me.
He looked down at my chest. “I pulled away, too. Because I thought you were done dealing with me.”
I quickly rolled him to his back, settling my body between his thighs. Bracing myself up on one elbow, I cupped his cheek with my other hand. “Never, baby. Are you telling me that these months of separation was because I said something that hurt you?” Slowly, he nodded. I closed my eyes and blew out a harsh breath, then rested my forehead on his. “I’m sorry, Jesse. I’m so fucking sorry. I never meant that how it sounded. I thought it was good we would all have our own rooms. But I never meant that to be taken as you and I no longer sharing a bed anymore, baby. I need you as much as you’ve always needed me.”
“Promise?” he whispered.
Lifting my head so I could meet his pretty eyes, I nodded. “I fucking swear it, baby. It’s been hard as fuck to breathe without you right next to me.”
A small smile tilted his lips, and then, he lifted his head, pressing his lips to mine in a soft, quick kiss. Even though it didn’t last more than a mere second, my heart flipped in my chest and my gut swooped all the same.
I was so gone over Jesse Link. Always had been. Always would be.
The spot beside me was empty when I woke up the next morning. Groaning, I rolled onto my back and scrubbed the heels of my hands against my eyeballs. Yawning, I flung the blankets back and rolled out of bed, stumbling toward the bathroom to shower and get dressed for the day. No doubt, Jesse had gotten up and done the same. Made me feel a little panicky that he wasn’t next to me when I woke up, but I was trying not to be overbearing.
Just so fucking hard to not want to be when I’d just gotten him back.
I took a quick shower, then dressed in jeans and a hoodie before heading for the kitchen for coffee. A grin tilted my lips when I found Jesse making two cups. When I cleared my throat, he looked over his shoulder at me and smiled. And fuck, his smile was so damn beautiful that for a moment, I forgot how to breathe.
Who needed to breathe when his smile alone filled my lungs with air?
“Hello, we’re in the room, too,” Kalin drawled from his spot at the bar, where he, Spike, Tor, and Salem were all sitting around. I rolled my eyes at them and made my way toward Jesse. Surprising me because I didn’t think he was much of one for PDA, he turned his head and caught my lips in a small, quick kiss. I vaguely heard Tor whisper, “Awe,” but I ignored him.
