And it felt strange that Hannah wasn’t here. Leaving those messages, but her phone being switched off straight after. It was bothering him.
He shook the thoughts away. He was just too hot andsweaty – the heat always made him cranky, and despite the clouds that still hovered above, it was hotter than hell out here, the humidity far more intense than back in Austin, the damp air cloying in his nostrils.
Once they’d reached the pavilion, passing Paola’s jeep and the clearing next to it, there was a small wooden signpost bedded into the mulchy brown earth, pointing to a pathway through the forest.
‘To the waterfall,’ read Naya. ‘Great, it’s this way.’
They picked their way carefully amongst the branches, rocks and mud. Occasionally Ben paused to glance further up the path, trying to get a sense of the route. But the canopy of trees bathed the track in shade, the heavy foliage constructing a jade curtain that disguised anything more than twenty feet ahead.
His backpack snagged on a low-hanging branch; for a second, he thought it was going to tear away from his body altogether. A wave of panic ran through him, then passed.It’s OK; my bag is on my back.In his room, he’d had no idea what to pack for the walk – he’d spent twenty minutes putting things in his bag and taking them out again while the others waited for him. In the end, he’d settled for a towel and a spare T-shirt, a bottle of water, Paola’s food and some insect repellent – a hasty airport buy.
And one more thing. Something he’d grabbed from the kitchen while the others were busy in their rooms – something to protect himself in case they ran into a hungry predator of some kind – a jaguar, perhaps. Paola had assured them the route they were taking was safe, yes, but it was still a jungle; who knew what they might need to defend themselves from?
Bag packed, he’d heard Naya call out to him. He’d beenabout to head downstairs when, at the last minute, he’d paused; and waited for the familiar, inevitable conversation, the eternal internal struggle to play out in his head:
Don’t do it, don’t do it.
But if I just take one... surely one won’t hurt – one barely does anything.
You know where it leads, though. You can never just take one.
I know, but... fuck it, I’ll just keep them in my bag – just in case.
And then he’d hurried back to his suitcase, taken out the foil packet tucked in its lining and shoved it into a side pocket of his rucksack before joining the others. At the front door, his eyes had landed on the hallway cabinet, where he’d dutifully placed his phone after breakfast. It didn’t feel good – he’d have felt better if he could just have checked his emails, sent one more message to Trish before they left. But there was no time; the others were there, waiting for him. And besides – what more was there to say? He’d already spent too long hunched next to the Wi-Fi router in the middle of the night, walking up and down, triggering those goddamn lights on and off, trying to get enough of a signal to reply to Trish’s email. The words swam in front of his eyes now:
I hope you’re doing well, Ben. I’m sorry for what was said in our last conversation. I hope you know I want the best for you. I trust you’ll do what’s needed to put things right.
Thecompassionin her eyes when she’d told him to go and ‘get himself together’, that was the worst part. He couldn’t bear the pity – he didn’t need it. There was nothing that wrong with him. OK, he worked too hard. And yes, he liked a littleboost now and then, a spur, something to help him to focus – to help him achieve his best. But it was because he was ambitious. He always had been; it was what growing up like he did had taught him: that success was everything, and financial success was the kind that mattered most.
Ben’s cheeks felt warm; he didn’t like going there – remembering where he’d come from. He brushed the thoughts away, focused on the rainforest. He was starting to enjoy the trek now. The downpour had made the ground slippery, and they had to be careful to navigate the fallen branches and vines underfoot, but it was sort of fun, too – splashing through puddles, picking across rocks and stones and mulchy earth. He felt like a kid, playing in the wild, exhilarated by mud and dirt and water; the kind of thing he’d never got to do when he wasactuallya kid. Perhaps he could make up for some of that now.
The wildlife along their walk was breathtaking: howler monkeys swinging from branch to branch, brightly coloured parrots and toucans nestled in the thick foliage above their heads. He even thought he saw a sloth in one of the trees, but it was too far away to make out for sure. As the track got narrower and the vegetation around them thicker, Scott had taken on the role of track marker: every few minutes, Ben saw him spray a trunk with a small speck of white paint.
‘It feels wrong to spray these beautiful old trees with this stuff,’ said Naya. ‘Like you’re desecrating them somehow.’
‘Don’t worry – this stuff washes off easily with a bit of water. We can do it on our way back,’ said Scott, touching Naya gently on the shoulder – was that a touch of flirtation, perhaps?Well, why not, I guess?He’d probably try to turn on the charm with Naya himself, if he weren’t so distracted bythoughts of Hannah and where she was. Or on Carly, who was hot too, although she’d mentioned last night that she was into women, hadn’t she? A shame. He wasn’t especially attracted to either woman, but he liked the thrill of it; the validation of someone wanting him.
After an hour or so of walking, they tuned into the sound of rushing water. ‘I think we’re almost there,’ said Mira. Her voice was wistful, and now Ben looked at her and noticed something new.She’s different out here.There was colour in her cheeks; and though she looked tired, there was something else: a sparkle to her since they’d come out into the rainforest, and it made her look alive – and something more. He searched for the word, landed on it at last:ethereal.
Soon, the space between the mammoth leaves that had been dripping fat raindrops onto their heads began to expand, the path widened and the rushing sound became a roar. The trees thinned out, gradually giving way to a solid bank of mud, engorged by the rainfall, and then... the most stunning view Ben had ever seen. A large clearing, where a tall, wide, torrent of water tumbled over rocks that had formed into an almost perfect staircase.
The waterfall frothed into a gorgeous, green-blue pool that looked as if it had been dramatically swollen by the rain, almost bursting out of its banks. From the pool, the water cascaded down a rushing stream and disappeared around a corner. Ben’s jaw dropped as he spun around, taking it all in: it was breathtaking.
‘This place is stunning,’ said Carly, raising her voice over the crashing water. ‘Look how clear the water is! Does anyone want to join me for a dip? Naya?’
‘I’ll come,’ Scott said, smiling at Carly. ‘If the invitation’s open to me?’
‘Of course!’
Mira shook her head. ‘Are you sure it’s a good idea?’ she said. ‘The current looks quite strong, and it might be deep, after the rain...’
‘It’ll be fine,’ said Carly. ‘The water’s still pretty shallow – I reckon it’ll only reach our knees – see?’
Ben watched as Carly and Scott picked their way across the rocky ground to the edge of the water, stripped down to their swimsuits and started to wade into the frothing pool, splashing and shrieking with laughter.
‘It’s gorgeous – you’ve got to come in, guys!’ shouted Carly.
‘Screw it,’ said Ben. ‘I’m doing it.’
