“I thought you would be happy with a new wardrobe, sprout. Isn’t that what you used to do all day back at home? Get dressed and be shiny?”
“Do you miss it?” I cut him off. For whatever reason, I did not feel the need to listen to his impertinence today. I missed having a proper conversation with someone, one that didn’t involve lying or pretending and even though Rhylan wasn’t a fine example of either situation, he was the only one I had. The only constant presence in this past week.
“I have my days,” he confessed, and watching the expression on my face, the dire need for conversation, he continued. “As you may have realised by now, I am one of the few who can come and go as they please, so I have enjoyed the benefit for the past two centuries. I loved the technological advancements, it’s wondrous to see how humans turned the world,” he confessed and I was surprised to read excitement in his voice.
“Of course, that leads to their destruction since they prove unable to abstain themselves,” he paused and lingered, wanting to reveal something else, something more. I guess I wasn’t deserving of the confession, because he continued, “It is still surprising to discover how every time I resurface, there is something new to be obtained, some new toy for me to play with,” he added with a smile.
“How is it?” I asked with curiosity, absorbing his every word, “To be there every time the world changes?”
“Terrifying,” he stopped. “Thrilling.” Another moment. “Scary. One day you humans will manage to make me feel old,” he said sweetly, and both he and I knew that wasn’t true.
“I doubt someone as dashing as yourself will have difficulties,” I confessed with a grin and Rhylan’s eyes went wide.
“Well, well, sprout, keep behaving like this, and I will have to marry you for real,” he smiled back and I didn’t know if he meant it as a joke or not, but my need to be attached to someone, to have someone in those lonely moments, made me escape a perky reply.
“Keep smiling like that and I might say yes.” As soon as I said it, as soon as I heard myself pronouncing the words, I realised my mistake and hated my tongue for uttering them. Although I promised, I swore not to do it again, not in front of him, tears flooded my eyes.
I lowered my head quickly to hide them, to disguise my feelings somehow, but he was by my side in an instant. Stepping that self-imposed barrier into the bedroom.
I felt his hands around me, tugging me to his chest where a whiff of expensive perfume tickled my nostrils. Was there ever a time when this man did not look and felt impeccable?
“I’m sorry,” I tried to drag myself away from the embrace and wipe my nose with the back of my hand but his arms wrapped around me tighter and I let go. Let myself be lost in an embrace I needed so badly.
“What is it, sprout?” His hands caressed my head in such a way that they removed most of the hair from my cheek, leaving my face bare and extremely close to his own.
“Nothing, silly girl problems,” I said, remembering his accusations from the very first night, after dinner.
“Tell me,” he pleaded and his voice sounded understanding, concern flickering in his tone.
“I’m with people all day, but I never felt so alone. Not even in Evigt…” I cried out, allowing my face to rest on his chest. I felt like a traitor, that was not the man I wanted, not the chest I wanted to cry on, but I felt so desperate that it didn’t matter. All I wanted was someone. Anyone. To talk to. To hold.
“Isn’t your prince caring for you?” he asked with both surprise and concern.
“I barely spoke to him all week,” I admitted. “He’s always late, avoiding me, angry with me,” I panted, new tears forming in my eyes.“It’s like staying away is his new mission or something.”
Rhylan’s jaw clenched. “That’s not what…” he stopped and breathed deeply, as though to calm himself, eyes closed only for a moment, some sort of realisation striking him.
“Get through today, and I’ll have something waiting for you at dinner,” he caressed my hair once again. That was my cue to separate from his touch and stand, taking a step back. Away.
Away from him.
“Don’t you dare hurt Ansgar,” I threatened, though my voice sounded raspy and defeated.
“It may not seem like it, princess, but I am also capable of kindness,” he pierced me with a disappointed gaze, then stood from the bed himself and walked back to the door, without saying another word.
I got ready quicker than ever and followed after him in the hallway, unable to shake theimpression that I might have hurt him with my words. As if Rhylan cared enough to listen.
After another long day of dress fitting — this time they were preparing my engagement gown, a dark, almost crimson velvet dress designed in a very puffy and strange A-line— Rhylan came to escort me to dinner.
Or so I thought, because he did not accompany me through the usual corridors leading to the throne room, which I had learnt by heart. Instead, we walked to the right and back towards mine and Ansgar’s room. I assumed, for the surprise he had mentioned.
My heart started trepidating, terrified of Rhylan’s view of a surprise and whatever he planned, but curiosity led me forward so I followed after him like a lost puppy until we reached the corridor with our rooms.
Instinctively, I walked to my door, just like I did every night after dinner, but Rhylan stopped me by grabbing my wrist.
“That one,” he pointed to the door opposite our own. Where he had mentioned his rooms would be.
I swallowed hard but did as told and shifted to open the other door, which cracked with a noise. I waited for him to enter first but he pointed towards the entrance, a silent invitation for me to go ahead. Again, I did as told.
