“I'm...willing,” I replied, and feeling the need to show her how ready my body was for her, I removed the cover, giving her an eyeful of my desire.
Chapter Twenty-Three
The last thing I expected to see in that moment was Ansgar’s dick, but there it was, full-grown, and ready for me. I remained still, not knowing what to say or how to react. Did he really want this? By the looks of it, he did. Oh my gods, and how he did.
A burning sensation in my stomach croaked and urged me to go to him, to jump onto his lap and impale myself into him then and there. If not for his sake, then for my own sanity. I dreamed about our reunion for so many nights, ever since I found out that he was alive and now his body reacted to me, wanting me.
“I don’t know if we should do this,” I heard myself saying, my brain taking control and winning the battle against my lower parts. He didn't respond, didn’t make a single gesture, did not move to cover himself or to step towards me, pushing this on. He simply remained steady, cock hard, watching me, letting me decide the next step. And I knew that one word from me would calm him down and make him forget about this idea without further protest. Just because part of his body reacted to me did not mean that I had to do something about it, that I had to follow the insatiable urge begging in between my legs.
He did not know me, he had absolutely no idea who I was, and in the past two days, I acted like a nurse rather than a girlfriend. Maybe that’s why he felt attraction towards me, simply because I was the first person not to try and kill him. No, I couldn’t do this.
“I feel like I'm taking advantage of you,” I explained, my breath heavy with longing and urge.
“How so?” he asked with equally heavy inhales.
“You are not okay right now. Mentally,” I added quickly, the last thing I wanted was for him to think that I felt no attraction towards him.
“You are scared of me,” Ansgar sighed and immediately moved to cover himself, but before he could put another word in, I added, “No, Ansgar, I’m not scared at all,” I walked to him and took a seat on the bed, dangerously close to him with only that flimsy cotton blanket separating us. “It’s not that, it’s just— you’ve been through a lot and me coming here to ask for sex feels...weird, unfair to you. It's not that I don’t want it,” I shook my head and waved a hand as if to show how much I actually wanted him, “trust me, I have fantasised about this moment in my head for so long. Obviously not you being injured and not remembering things but us, toghe—”
I did not have time to finish because Ansgar’s lips covered mine in a soft caress, making me stop and forget every single excuse I tried to find, to convince myself not to proceed with this. But his lips on mine, his tongue slowly sliding in with delicate movements, making sure I was okay with him continuing the kiss, made me forget about everything else. Everything except wanting him, needing him. So I let myself drift to his lips, finding the heaven I had lost, claiming him once again as mine.
He did not hesitate, his gestures sure and unhurried, tasting every drop of me and feeling every part of my skin, like he was discovering my body for the first time. Which, come to think of it, he was. I allowed my fingers to trace across his shoulders, to reclaim the connection we lost and was surprised to discover smooth skin instead of the hundreds of injuries I had cleaned across his body the day before. Magic, I smiled to myself and felt grateful for this moment, abandoning myself in the present and letting go of worry and fear of whatever may come.
I was here, in his arms. Finally, after so much struggle, after such a long time, I had him again. And by the ravenous way he started devouring my mouth, I knew he wanted to have me too. So I let him. Let him discover, let him chase my lips every time I pulled away to make sure it was not too much, that he did not experience any lingering pain.
“I want you,” Ansgar whispered in my ear, his breath brushing against the skin and raising up sensation all across my body. “Goddess, how I want you,” he said it again, his tongue building a trail across my neck. “Please, let me have you,” he pleaded, his hand cupping my breast over the corset and stained shirt.
“Always,” I murmured.
That was it, that was the signal he needed to unleash himself. Within an instant, Ansgar shifted up, pinning me to the bed and climbing on top of me, securing my thighs in place with his own, his length splayed across my lower belly, twitching with eagerness.
I could not contain myself and touched every part of him, relishing in that smooth and soft skin that covered most of his body, replacing the wounds and dread he had been through.
Without a warning, Ansgar pulled on my shirt and ripped it open, just like he did with my dress that first time we’d been together. Involuntarily, I started shaking, with anxiety, with desire and want, with the need to feel him inside of me again.
“Are you alright?” he sensed my trembling and took a halt from kissing the upper part of my breasts, which just then decided to escape from the corset that kept them pressed for so long and enjoy their new freedom.
“Never better,” I murmured and kissed him feverishly, devouring his lips like they were some legendary fountain of youth and I was a dying woman. I felt him smirking underneath the kiss and grabbing me tightly, pulling on my jeans and corset with urgent need.
I let him, all the while splaying my hands across his back and drawing lines with my nails, sharp enough to probably leave marks on that newly healed skin.
In the urgency to uncover my full breasts, Ansgar got bored of nibbling at the string of my corset and pulled me up along with it, then gripped the fabric on both sides and ripped it apart while I was still wrapped in it. Gods, how I wanted him, and his eagerness made me unable to contain myself, especially after having another look at his forever growing member.
“What’s this?” he stopped abruptly, plucking something from the discarded parts of what used to be my corset.
“Oh shit,” I exclaimed, everything coming back to me in an instant. The dagger. The dagger his brothers gave me, the one that was supposed to help Ansgar. One that with everything happening around us, I forgot I had. I must have gotten so used to having it pinching my skin that I grew accustomed to the sensation. And there it was, I noticed, looking down on my ribs, lots of small nips and cuts the weapon formed from the contact with my skin, the constant brushing against it.
“It’s yours, I'm supposed to give it to you so it helps you grow your energy back. Your family said you’ll know what to do,” I explained, but he looked at me with confusion, his lips red and cheeks flushed from what we had been doing.
“I don’t,” he raised his shoulders slightly and looked at me with innocence.
“Marreth said something when he came to bring us clothes,” I started speaking, though I knew how crazy it sounded. But considering that he suggested we had sex and we stopped just in the middle of it, it might not be so far off the bat. “He said that it’s best to use something of yours when we...do this,” I repeated the commander’s words, unsure of what term to use. Have sex, fuck, make love? I knew what it meant for me, but maybe on Ansgar’s side I was just a way to enjoy himself for a while, relieve the stress of this wait and whatever would come our way.
“Use it on me?” he asked, shifting closer in bed, so close that I could grab that length of his without changing my position. The length which surprisingly, did not feel the need to release any pressure and remained as hard and wanting as it was at the very beginning of this.
“It’s your birthstone, I think it might help…”
“Anwen, if you let me fuck you, you can cut my neck afterward if you wish,” he responded in an eager tone, hands ready to explore me yet again.
