“I will.” I cleared my throat. Months of voice coaching had brought me back to where I’d been before the benign polyp— and thank God, it had proved benign— upended my life. I’d thought a few times of writing a wedding song and performing something for Lee. But I didn’t want our vows to be a performance. So I said simply in return, “I never met anyone whose heart spoke to me like yours does. We both lived and grew and changed in those twenty years apart, but we came together again knowing it was right at last. Will you marry me and grow old with me, however that plays out?”
“I will.” Lee’s response came strong and clear. I’d asked him a few times if he was prepared for the fact that I’d be growing old a lot sooner than he would. He’d pointed out that Harvey was a lot younger than Owen, and it was Owen who was still on hisfeet. We never knew what life had in store. He wasn’t going to let a stupid thing like an age difference rob us of one minute more. As I stood holding his hands and staring into his gorgeous gray eyes, I was glad my almost-husband was such a strong man.
“The rings?” Owen asked our best people.
Pete dug my box out of his pocket and Kashira unearthed Lee’s from somewhere in her skirt. As she passed it over, Lee caught the side seam of her dress, pulled the fabric in a wide drape, and said, “It has pockets!”
A ripple of laughter ran through our audience, mostly from the women.
Lee opened his box, took out the ring, and handed the empty container back. I did the same with mine and we faced each other again. For a moment, time stood still, standing there surrounded by the people who meant the most to us, rings in our hands, hearts full. Lee grasped my fingers in his. I realized my hand was trembling. He slid the gold band over my fingertip, worked it down where it belonged, and grinned.
I took his hand in turn and eased the matching band onto his fourth finger. The strength of his hand in mine, the trust he gave me in this moment and always, echoed in my heart. I rotated the ring, edging it over his knuckle and then lower to seat at the base of his finger. No longer shaking, I raised his hand to my lips and kissed him right there, above that golden band.
Owen announced, “By the power vested in me by the state of Iowa, I pronounce you husband and husband. You may kiss.”
I’d have kept the kiss light and chaste for the sake of our mixed audience, but Lee hauled me to him, put his hand behind my head, and kissed the hell out of me. I closed my eyes and let him lead. I was safe in his hands.
When we came up for air, our friends and family began cheering. My face was probably flushed, but I kept a grip on Lee and turned to face them. Ellen had her fingers pressed to her lips, her eyes damp, but beside her, Yolanda cheered and whistled. Quinn beat a thundering crescendo on the top of an empty box off to the side of the gazebo. Harvey pumped his good fist.
Then Shondra played a chord, and the members of Chaser Lost, plus Mandy and Colby and a couple of my other LA friends stepped forward and began to sing Pete’s hit “You’ve Done It Now!”
Lee hugged me to his side, his smile ear to ear, as our friends celebrated our marriage in enthusiastic rockstar style. Half the audience sang along, the rest nodded and toe-tapped and faked the lyrics. When the line,Fuck, you’ve gone and done it, came around, the volume got loud. People grinned. Pete tipped his head to me, still belting the vocals. Lee squeezed my hand.
I thought back to a dark day a year ago when the only person at my side was my lawyer, and I looked guilt and prison in the face.I’m sorry, Linda,I thought now.So sorry. But I’m going to live and love and be a good husband to Lee. I’ll probably screw up again, please God never that badly, though. But I’m going to live my life with my songs and music and friends and my beloved, and do the best I can to be worthy of the time I have left on this earth.
If this’d been a cheesy movie, there’d have been a cut to a white dove flying overhead or a convenient ray of sunshine, forgiveness from above. But in real life, if I were Linda or her family, I wouldn’t give me that satisfaction. What I’d learned in the last year, from Lee and Ellen and some therapy too, wasthat I had to go on without being forgiven. I could go on. I was allowed to have joy.
And standing there as a rude rock song echoed from the people around me and smiles wreathed their faces? As I leaned against the big, solid bulk of my husband with my fingers wrapped in his? This was joy, in one pure, perfect moment.
Lee
In the quiet of our bedroom, I reached up and tugged Griffin’s tie free of its knot and slipped the royal blue silk from around his neck.
He blew out a breath and opened his collar. “As incredible as you look in that suit, I’m glad to get out of mine.”
“Likewise.” I draped our ties on the dresser, shrugged out of my jacket, and hung it away because that suit cost more than any clothes I’d ever owned.
“The wedding went well, don’t you think?” Griffin reached past me for a hanger.
I laughed and bent to brush a kiss on the back of his neck as I passed. “It was perfect. Everyone had a blast. And Owen tipping his food over the head of that paparazzi and pretending to be senile was awesome.”
Griffin sighed. “I’m not sure why that dude still shows up now and then. I’m really old news. I’m not even doing Rocktoberfest this year.”
“He has some kind of fixation. But seeing him with pasta dripping down his face was satisfying.”
“Yeah. True.”
“And then Harvey knocked his phone out of his hand and ran over it with his wheelchair.” I grinned. “I do like our friends. Speaking of, Yolanda said to tell you she can die happy now.”
“I hope you told her she’s not allowed to die anytime soon.”
“Yep. And Chaser Lost gave her a VIP pass for Rocktoberfest, so she said maybe she’ll hang on until then.”
“I don’t have half her energy.” Griffin unbuttoned his shirt.
I paused to watch his chest being revealed.Mmm.“She’ll probably outlive both of us,” I agreed absently, more of my attention on Griffin’s bare skin than the conversation.
He looked up, caught my eye, and turned sliding the shirt off his shoulders into a strip tease.
