“And we got lucky,” Owen said. “But that was when we actually did the legal you-know-what. Yeah, Harvey’s uncle visiting was a push, but that scare? There’s no terror like thinking you might not be able to be there for the person you love.”
Harvey nodded. “We did what we had to do, the only thing we could do, like a lot of other guys did back then. No matter how complicated it makes the legalities now, I have no regrets about that. It let me sleep at night, and I’d been managing on three hours a night for too long. Let me leave town knowing I had a legal right to be called if something happened.”
“It took time to rebuild trust, though,” Owen offered. “We had some more fights. Big things and small ones. But we’d made our decision that year, that we’d stick it out together, because nothing was worse than being apart.”
I ran my fingers through my beard, tugging a little. I heard what they were saying, but I also knew that by 1988, these guys had already been together for twelve years. Of course they weren’t willing to split up. That wasn’t true of me and Griffin. I could still save myself a world of pain by stepping back. I wasn’t committed.
“I’m glad it worked out,” I told them. “Really glad. Now, Harvey, Noreen said you had a skin problem I should check? Owen, if you’d close the door, I’ll take a look.”
The two men exchanged a glance I couldn’t read, and then Owen got up and shuffled over to shut the door.
Chapter 19
Griffin
LA felt like a foreign country as I stepped out of the terminal. The smell of the air and the relentless sun even in October, the bright colors and fashions and multiple languages around me, the bustle of the crowd— I’d made LA my home for a decade, and now the place seemed alien.
I hauled the cart with my guitars and luggage toward the curb, a ball cap worn low over my forehead, not meeting anyone’s eyes. This was LA though. There were a dozen bigger stars than me coming through LAX every day of the week. I could’ve probably waltzed through with my name on my jacket and folks would’ve just yawned.
They wouldn’t yawn at Pete Lebraun, though, which was why a limo with smoked windows stood at the curb and the driver came my way. “Mr. Marsh? Mr. Lebraun is waiting for you. I’ll load up your things.”
“Careful with the guitars,” I said automatically and then flushed because if this guy worked with Pete, he knew all about that.
He just said, “Yes, sir,” and held the back door of the limo for me.
I slid onto the leather seat and he closed me in. Pete sat across from me. He grinned and held out his hand, clasping mine with strong fingers as we shook. “Griff. It’s been way too long, man.”
“Well, you know, I got a bit busy the last six months.”
“I heard.” He peered into my face as the sound of loading came from the back of the car. “I messaged you early on, but I didn’t want to push.”
I hadn’t seen his text. But then, for a while, I’d just deleted everything that wasn’t court related. “Thanks. I wasn’t in a good headspace to talk to anyone.”
“How are you now?”
Better than Linda Bellingham.“I’m good.”
“And the throat nodules? You’ll be able to perform?”
“Should be.” After taking my mornings off from Wellhaven— maybe a coward’s move, but I couldn’t look at Lee like nothing had happened— I’d put in a ton of extra practice, mostly guitar but also singing, a little at a time. As far as I could tell, I still sounded pretty good. A little extra rasp never hurt.
“Good to hear. It sucks either way, but would suck a lot more if you had to miss the biggest show of the year.”
“I have to thank you again—”
Pete waved me off. “Rocktoberfest management asked us who we’d invite and it was a no-brainer. You gave us a hell of a break when we were total unknowns, then showed us what a real pro on tour looks like. We owe you everything and being able to pay back even a little? We jumped at the chance.”
“I can’t wait to play with you guys again.” I realized that was true, and a little of the fog I’d been walking in for days lifted. “I need this. A break.”
“You look wiped.” Pete sat back as the driver got in. “We’re going to my place. You’ll stay with me, of course.”
“A hotel would be fine.”
“Fuck that shit. The rest of the band is at my place. You don’t have to jam with us if you don’t want to tonight, but we’ve got a barbecue grilling and they’ll be glad to see you.”
I took a long, slow breath. “Thanks.” I needed that. An uncomplicated evening with friends. Food, music, no responsibilities, no worries, no guilt, no loss. Pretend the last year hadn’t happened and we were just hanging out and jamming together.
If the last year didn’t happen, neither did Wellhaven, Willow, Ellen treating you like a mom should, Owen and Harvey getting married. Neither did Lee.
